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Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 2079. page
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File: 140235394322.gif (486 KB, 499x239) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
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I just swallowed cum for the first time, but it's getting hard to hold it down.

I really don't wanna ruin my first sexual by vomiting, any tips on avoiding regurgitation?
13 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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go to /b/
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>>16550889
Have someone pat your back and burp you.
>>
if hes not around puke it up then

I have a lot of issues with insecurity, and I snooped on my boyfriend's (of 2 yrs) "notes" in his phone : ( I found something there that said that "4 of the most beautiful people he worked with" had asked him out in the past week. A couple weeks later, asked him if anyone ever asks him out, he said no. What do I do? I want to come clean about the snooping.
16 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>I have a lot of issues with insecurity

yeah you and everyone else on the planet. But the rest of us just don't roll around in it like a dog who finds shit on the ground. Insecurity is not a reason to be an asshole, which is what you are being.

Who knows what the note is even referencing?
If it's really about him, it said nothing about him accepting the interest, or you'd have said that.
and, if you're really insecure, I sure as fuck wouldn't tell you things you didn't need to know over which I had...
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>>16550837
Yes, I know this. I'm just wondering why he didn't tell me?

I do know it was about it him- it listed their names and the way they asked him out. Ie "kate came up to me and asked me if I was still seeing x and asked if I'd like to go see a movie together"...


Should I tell him I snooped? I feel like I should. Even if not to confront him about this white lie, which is essentially harmless- though I am a bit confused about marrying someone who wouldn't tell me something like that...
>>
Anyone have some perspective about why he might not tell me? He doesn't want to make me feel bad or something? I would really like him to tell me those kinds of things, not out of jealousy, but yeah, just as conversation, I tell him if people ask me out. Idk.

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Hey /adv/, whenever I stay at my girlfriend's house lately I've been waking up at ~5am and being violently sick. I'm fine if I'm sleeping in my own bed, it just seems to be her place. Has anyone ever heard of this?
12 replies and 2 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>16550771

Pet allergies if she has a dog or cat that normally sleeps on the bed?
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>>16550804
no, she has a dog but it stays outside. It's not been a problem until recently.
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>>16550771
You're allergic to heterosexual sex

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I am horny asfk and fap so much. I used to fap more than 3 times a week but I'm fapping once a week these past months. how can I stop ! pls help /adv/
11 replies and 2 images submitted. Click here to view.
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use tabasco sauce as lube
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>>16550695
Refocus the energy you put into jerking your dick into improving yourself so you can get a girlfriend, then fuck her every day. You won't want to fap then.
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Don't stop, I fap once or maybe even twice a day and not even counting actual sex lmao, it's supposedly healthy for you. Keep on stroking my friend!

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Am horny and fap too much. How do I stop? I do have a gf and I am in college.
11 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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Fuck girlfriend more and ez off the fap. Done.
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>>16550663
> fuck gf more
Yeah, she's been kinda not in the mood recently. Plus we busy college kids.

> ez off the fap

Harder said that done, at least for me. I'm already at 2 for today and some days in the past week I hit 4 or 5 times.
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>>16550681
Finals has everyone stressed, and finals + stress + pms = less sex, more eating.

Give her a week or so, she'll be ready to get back in the mood.

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can i be suspended from school for Nazi salute i was just kidding and this Mexican Jew flipped her shit on me I might go to principals office tomorrow.
16 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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This place is for 18+ kid, fuck off.
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>>16550636
Don't worry if your principle has any sense of humor you'll be okay I mean it's classic after all you'll probs just have a good laugh about it and he'll suspend that Mexican
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Whether or not that's a suspending offense probably varies from district to district, but one way or another you're in trouble. That stuff has been punishable for decades.

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Something just happened and I started having these symptoms:

>extreme chills all over my body
>shaking
>really fast heartbeat
>sense of doom or despair

What's happening to me? I'm kinda freaking out.
14 replies and 2 images submitted. Click here to view.
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Panic attack?
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>>16550594
I'm kinda just shivering right now and myou hands are cold
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>>16550601
I thought that was supposed to be way worse like just not being able to move. I can move but I'm just cold and my feet and hands are cold and I'm shaking.

I'm worried my girlfriend's son has an incredibly toxic father, and I'm not sure what to do. Explanation below.

I've been with this girl for almost a year now. She has a 3-yo boy and I get along great with both of them. The father (who I've been told is a bit of a white-trash type, in the way he acts and the family he comes from) is supposed to take him on weekends, but in the past usually didn't live up to his commitments. When he did, the child would always be given back to his mom in a rotten mood, tantruming about the smallest things...
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11 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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Why is a guy who is dating a girl suddenly have the right to talk and act like a father? You knew this kid for a short while, back the fuck off stop injecting yourself in his life like that.

You do nothing, this is a problem for the girlfriend to deal with not you.
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>>16550576
Punch the kid in the face
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>>16550576
The only way you get a say in that child's life is if you put a ring on his mother's finger.

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I need the cheesiest, funniest and most outrageous pick up lines you guys can think of pretty fast

Pic unrelated
30 replies and 5 images submitted. Click here to view.
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You: "Whoa!"
Her: "What?'
You: 'Was that an earthquake or did you rock my world?"
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Is that a mirror in your pants because I can see myself in them.

Let's play 'house' You'll be the door and I'll slam you.

All I can think of. May I inquire why the sudden need?

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Girlfriend always wants to have sex and sends me lewd messages/pictures of herself when I'm in class or out with friends. Unfortunately, I have a low sex drive for a guy and can't keep up with her. What do?
38 replies and 3 images submitted. Click here to view.
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Break up with her so she can date a real man
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have third party black men come in and take care of her for you.
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>>16550442
Inject testosterone.

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callout to marriedfags with kids. i got a question.

so i know this is common place and somewhat "duh" worthy but i gotta ask ... did your sex life start to kinda suck after you had kids with your wife ?

my wife and i have been together 5 years. we met in our late 20s. we had two boys kinda fast and since boy #2 (1.5 year ago) sex has just been ... different. not complaining too much cause unlike some fellows out there i still get it, but i just don't feel any spark from her anymore. she'll "take care of me" or "lemme do stuff"...
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30 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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My kids aren't as close as yours, but I have a 2.5 year old and a 3 month baby.
We haven't had sex since the baby was born. She tells me she has no sexual desire at all and flinches away from me when I try and kiss her because she doesn't want to lead me on. The few times we do kiss I get so turned on I start touching her more and she pulls away.
I feel like right now she thinks any touch from me is me wanting sex from her. So I'm going to try and touch her more with non expectation. Start off small like a quick kiss on the cheek or make sure we sit...
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>>16550432
do you do anything she wants? does she ask to do anything?

maybe take her out some place away from the kids where she doesn't need to worry or stress. might bring back some passion?
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>>16550461
it wasnt as bad for me, but 3 months is still relatively short. i can relate to the "no expectations" thing though. i massage my wife a lot and have been regularly blamed for "trying stuff" after a massage "like it was owed to me". i get that men get horny a lot and how it could be exhausting for a woman still recovering from pregnancy, but the feeling of rejection starts stinging pretty hard whether you acknowledge it or not after a while. ive tried "not trying" for a while,...
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>literally get 100s on evertything.
>even final presentation and paper
>all quizzes are aced
>still pass with a 79% in the class
>all because I didnt do a 15pt survey, go to some student orientation thing worth 100, and didnt go to some bullshit out of school events that were worth 80 pts.

other than that survey everything i didnt do is literally just participation points. I participated several times in class...
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20 replies and 3 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>don't do what is required
>complain that you didn't get the marks 'you deserve'
Are you some kind of dumbass?
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>>16550184
school went from actually teaching us stuff to making us go to bull shit events that literally do not matter to what we are learning in class.


the concept of school in general is fucking gay nowadays. or at least here in the us its a fucking joke. thers some statistic showing 70% of chinese students cheating in college but still graduating. school is literally bullshit.

dont even get me started on my electrical engineering proffessor who caught us cheating on the final but still let us pass instead...
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>>16550195
Because anyone can sit down and memorise a textbook, and then regurgitate it. Participation shows that you've a) absorbed and understand what you've learnt and b) you're willing to go above and beyond the bare minimum. I'm sure you were told that you would get extra marks for attending these things right from the start, don't complain when you don't get those marks and don't pass with a grade you're happy with.

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Am I a freak for being mildly annoyed at my girlfriend's constant compliments on how good looking I am?

Put yourself in my shoes. Your girlfriend is awesome and she clearly really cares about you a lot. But she just will not let up on letting you know how handsome you are. Incessantly.

I'm fascinated by the behaviour to be honest. Sure, the odd compliment is completely normal in a relationship, in fact it's very sweet and kind. But the way she goes on about this... It makes me wonder whether it's a cover for something else? Almost like she's...
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Red flag OP. She actually thinks you're fucking ugly and is lulling you into a false sense of security before dumping your insecure ass. Consider yourself BTFO
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post pic op
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>>16550066
Wow it must suck being good looking. Fuck off please.

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Do it, while thinking on who you won't be kissing come NYE.
255 replies and 15 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>16550027
>implying I'll be kissing someone on NYE
>Implying I won't be standing there watching everyone else get their new years kiss
>Implying that I won't have my cup pressed against my lips while I chug whatever alcohol I have in an attempt to drown my sorrows
>>
That stung a little.
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I wonder how much I can get away with before they fire me for it

Is it OK for a father to beat up his son for this? Say a dad figured out from his kindergaden age daughter that his son may have interacted with her in a slightly innaapropriately way. Is he justified in hitting his son or is that plain abuse?
32 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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Justified.
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I don't think getting psychical is called for. How old is the son?
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>>16549940
What the fuck dude. You diddled your five year old sister? That's sick and you deserve to be raped in prison repeatedly along with being beat regularly and viciously.

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