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File: 1394906979412.jpg (41 KB, 395x700) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
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>Be 19 y/o kissless virgin
>6'3, but a small dick
>fatass, 210lbs
>never had a gf
>dont know how to start a conversation on an online dating site
Please help me /adv/. Could any of you give me some advice on how to start a proper conversation on a dating site (Okcupid in particular)? I really want to turn my life around but I don't have the motivation I need to get in shape, and a gf would give me that motivation.
16 replies and 3 images submitted. Click here to view.
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This sounds like a subconscious way to avoid having to lose weight. You've got it backward; you're not going to get a girlfriend as a fatass. At least not the sort you're probably hoping for. By setting an unlikely goal you're just pushing back the timetable on weight loss.

Plus the vast majority of weight loss comes from what you eat. Eat a reasonable quantity (1900 Calories) of healthy foods (lean meats, vegetables/beans, limited starches, no liquid calories) every day and the weight will evaporate. How will having a girlfriend help you with that since, for at least the amount of time it'll take to lose the weight, you'll only be sharing an occasional meal with her? It's the other 90% of the meals you eat which will determine the course of your weight loss.

Get your body together first. Then fix your personality. Then get a girlfriend.
>>
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>>16668788
>6'3
>210lbs
>fatass
Holy shit, you must have like no muscle.

t. 6'4 275 pounds, not fat
>>16668816
>reasonable quantity
>1900 kcal
Spooky
>>
>>16668788
>6'3
>210
>fatass
Worst bait this year

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So, guys,

Girlfriend ended up dragging me to some stupid dinner with our stupid friends, which I usually bail on, because they like to drop 100$ per person tabs at fancy restaurants.

Had a pretty bad incident with one of the friends in the social circle.

He was ribbing me, saying, anon, how come you never go out with us, we all know you can afford it, we've seen your house and your car,

And then he droned on for another 2 solid fucking minutes, ended up calling me "cheap" and I sort of had a meltdown.

I stood up, told him "that's why I have a nicer car than you and a nicer house and a girlfriend that doesn't look like a cow- because I don't go and drop $100 a night on dinner even though I can afford to drop $1000 a night on dinner- with your salary you should stay at home eating beans and try to pay off the 30 year adjustable on your shack' and fix her nose (points at his girlfriend) followed by some childish namecalling, and then I stormed out.

So uh, what now? None of my 'friends' have contacted me since. Girlfriend is "furious".

Is there uh, some recourse here or did I fuck up.
19 replies and 2 images submitted. Click here to view.
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You could try apologizing and saying that you are under a lot of stress and you just blew up at the wrong people. But there's no guarantee that will fix anything.
>>
no that was hot, i'd date you.

just let her cool off, dude sounded like a douche anyway
>>
Well.
I think you fucked up, but that was funny to read !

Anyway, I think you should wait a bit and try to talk to this guy again, or at least your other "friends".
Maybe they will understand if they hear your point of view.

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And its realy realy painfull guyz im 18 year old im in love with a girl. I dont eat anything like 18 hours only smoke and bong. Girl doesnt like me as always. we are friends. My question is how the fuck this pain goes ? Im crying like a little bitch. Only thing i do is lookin her photos listen portishead smoke and cry.
11 replies and 3 images submitted. Click here to view.
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Take a hold of your balls and reattach them.
>>
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>>16668715
It's amazing, isn't it? Strong feelings are such a gift, really makes you feel like you are alive. I revel in it.

The alternative is feeling nothingness.

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How do you get over losing a girl you love? not like the death, just something didnt work out and now shes gone.

thats what happened to me and i cant stop thinking about what could have been, might have been and her moving on from me. I love her so much and i dont want her to go but i already tried to get her to stay.

I feel so empty inside because all my thoughts have been about her and now it hurts to think about her. My life since i moved her has been centered around her, shes been my everything for a while.
11 replies and 2 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>16668703
It won't go away, and that's fine. Learn to live with it.
>>
I'll go away with time. it sounds like I was in a similar situation to yours. Talk to a therapist, get it off you chest, turn you negative energy into positive actions. Whenever I started thinking about her i would draw or exercise. It'll get better OP trust me, I've been there.
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>>16668706

Pretty much this. She's going to be apart of your life forever and there's no just forgetting it. Time helps, the first month is bad, the second month is better, the third month you should start feeling like yourself again and be able to move on.

Just try to keep yourself together and not start doing destructive things that will make the situation worse for yourself or for the people around you.

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How did you decide what to do with your life?
I will soon finish high school and my parents support me continuing studies in university. The problem is: I don't know what and where to study.
I don't want you to decide for me, but I want you to help me make my decision. I like science, but it's more of a hobby. I like maths and I'm good at it, but I don't see a job in that field that could get me money. I don't like hard-working job, but I have started thinking about studying medicine. The thing I don't like is that I would have very...
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I just started college and I've decided to become a paramedic. Once you have narrowed down your interests like, I wanted a hands on job where I could help people and make a good amount of cash. be honest with yourself with you wanna do. Maybe you could go into material sciences.
>>
Engineering requires you to be really good at math, but its workload is brutally hard. Math actually has a wide variety of fields associated with it, like actuaries, accountants, etc. which all have good career prospects.

Computer science is probably one of the most laid back majors, and being good at math and enjoying science, you may enjoy CS. You'll have plenty of time for vidya, anime, and sports, but also have great career prospects.
>>
Oh! And how did I decide? I went to uni and took a few classes and found something that I really enjoyed. IMO that's the best way to choose a major... take classes and figure out what makes you excited to do every day. No major needed going in.

/adv/, what do you think if you see a otherwise normal-looking girl wearing long sleeves at the gym? do you assume she has a skin condition, is a cutter, just gets cold very fast? this is probably a retarded thing to worry about but yeah, social anxiety.
48 replies and 4 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>16668649
Assuming I would even notice that, I would prolly assume she's a cutter and dislike her immediately
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>>16668649
Ummm, I spend most of my time just staring at your tits
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>>16668669
Yep.

Hello
I have a problem
Summary : I have a severe case of Exam Nerves, nothing is working and it's becoming a huge obstacle in my education.
I'm sure It's NOT just the fact that "Im not studying hard enough" or that "if you studied good enough, you wouldn't feel anxious during exams since you've practiced enough and are familiar with your subject"
I attend every single class.
I have literally never been absent once all semester long.
I take notes of pretty much everything.
Studying and solving examples is practically...
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Go to the hippie store and buy a little bottle of lavender essential oil. Smell it as you study. Then before the test, dribble a little on yourself or nearby.
>>
>>16668643

Thanks a lot for the advice but:
1. Couldn't the same effect be obtained with chewing gum?
2. I have no idea what is a hippie store nor do I think there's one where I live or what this lavender oil is. it's scaring me, is it some sort of drug?
>>
>>16668628
You need someone to study with, this gives you confidence in the amount and depth to study. Find a kid who is going to get an a and just talk out the material with them. It's easy to bullshit yourself that you have memorize something but hard to bullshit someone else.

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Hey /adv/ so I'm a virgin. (Big surprise)
But I've been dating this girl I met on a dating site and we've known each other for about a month and she is very sexual. She asks me to tell her whenever I'm horny and sends pictures, videos and we even skype but it's long distance so still no sex.
She tells me she wants to have sex all the time and honestly I can't wait too but she'd have to move in with me in a year for us to be together. She's cool to talk to and I feel like I really like her but a lot of the time I'm not sure if...
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By having sex with her for six months. That's how long it usually takes for couples to get past the honeymoon period and figure out if they actually are compatible.
>>
>but she'd have to move in with me in a year for us to be together
So you haven't actually met? If that's the case move on to something real.
>>
I love niggers

I need help. I have to get a job, but I have severe social anxiety and want to work alone.

What are some good foreveralone jobs?
12 replies and 2 images submitted. Click here to view.
>>
Translator.
>>
Cleaning.
>>
sou chef
gardener

I may be starting to date a girl who, as far as I know, has never had a stable boyfriend since I know her (3 years or so).
Should I be alarmed?
13 replies and 6 images submitted. Click here to view.
>>
I have no idea why that would concern you.
>>
All girls want is a good massage followed by an orgasm. Can you provide that? Daily?
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>>16668563
Yes.

I made this mistake, fell very much in love with her too.

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>be me
>19 y/o
>depressed since few years
>thinking about killing myself 24/7
>ugly ginger
>small uncut dick
>mild stutter/speech blocks (hard to start or keep conversation)
>unfit
>kissless virgin
>no close friends,just one mate but we only see each other to...
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its me x_x

don't really care since i will probably kill myself soon..meh
>>
>>16668541
Oh fuck off, you're not ugly
>>
Sounds like you have one problem; a sort of inability to pull the trigger. In a way, this is a good thing since if you can find the correct meds, your life will massively improve.

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Im an 18 year old male virgin who doesnt feel anything during sex. We've tried missionary, cowgirl and doggy and doggy feels the best but only actually feels for a short while in the beginning and after that I just get bored or tired. What do?
13 replies and 3 images submitted. Click here to view.
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First all, you're not a virgin.
>>
>>16668500
>virgin
Uwotm8sixhundred
>>
>>16668500
>virgin

Is this with someone you actually care about or just a random fuck buddy? The majority of what makes sex feel good is the emotional connection.

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My girlfriend of 3 years just asked for an open relationship two days ago.

We are in a long distance relationship in graduate school (she's in a PhD program, I'm in med school) and we see each other maybe once a month during the school year.

We haven't had sex since August and even before then it was on average less than once a month even when we lived together during the summer. I would bring it up and she would start crying and just saying she didn't feel like it. I just assumed our libidos didn't match up and tried my best to kill the...
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28 replies and 4 images submitted. Click here to view.
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Dude, it's over.

She doesn't even want to fuck you, do you really buy that her having sex with other people will want her to have more sex with you? Fucking lol.
>>
>>16668415
Done in one. /thread
>>
>>16668398
It is over. She has someone else in mind (the asker always does) and once she starts having her romantic needs met by someone not 1000 miles away, you are well and truly doomed.

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What's the best way to become a police officer in the uk? like what should I do before hand?
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>>16668271
Learning how to use google is a good start.
>>
>>16668290
Yeh sure, I've read their shit, but i'm asking for advice that they wouldn't say on their official shit.
>>
>>16668290

I laughed, but this is actually true.

Sometimes police officers have to do reasonable deduction and investigation on their own to catch a perp.

"Learning to use google" might sound like a troll answer, but it's a legitimate piece of advice.

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How to bring a girl to have a miscarriage/be infertile/abortion?
14 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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aside from violence, there's not many options for you other than some old wives' tales/home remedies that don't work
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>>16668234
Up until which week/month is violence an effective option that'll work? How much force would be needed (a solid punch to the stomach?)?
>>
>>16668234
Parsley tea does work, but good luck sneakily feeding her gallons of that.

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