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Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1542. page
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File: 18.jpg (335 KB, 2000x1502) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
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What do you do wrong when you want to fuck sluts, get a fuck-buddy etc but only attract girls who want a relationship?
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I should mention, I am pretty much a nice guy. Handsome, but a socially awkward computer nerd and late bloomer (first relationship in mid 20s)
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If your anything like me it means youre two good at sex. Like crazy good at sex. Much better than your grammar skills. Like sex skills > grammar skills by a gazillion. Bitches love good sexing and poor grammar. Its the perfect storm of panty dropping fall in love madness. Ya di
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If you're a nice guy women see you as relationship material and the bad boy as sex material.

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Ladies of /adv/ advise me on your ideal musculature preference in men, do you like the canon ball shoulder and thick neck look, or the lean fightclub look? Whats the best?
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File: muscles.jpg (139 KB, 1599x978) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
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Zyzz truly was the ideal man aesthetic-wise, though he roided which is stupid to do just to get pussy. In contrast, the guy in your OP pic isn't very attractive to me. My uneducated assumption is that he lifts for strength and not aesthetics.

On this chart I find ottermode and athletic to be the most aesthetic. Built and onward are a bit much. Skinnyfat is neutral and I wouldn't turn builtfat down but he's got more bodyfat than I prefer. Anything more though.. Let's be honest, even a slightly muscular guy has an edge up on the competition because...
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>>16814817
I think he is just roided to hell for size but not lean like Zyzz
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dad bods

File: if only.png (111 KB, 494x275) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
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I want to die, I've tried to kill myself multiple times but my attempts are just as pathetic and unsuccessful as I am. looking for ways to statistically increase my chance of dying. I already don't wear seatbelts and shit like that, but I'm not even lucky enough to get into a car accident.
(inb4 drive yourself into something - i dont have a liscense)
16 replies and 2 images submitted. Click here to view.
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Suicide is so much effort, it's easier to live.

call a friend, distract your mind. play a game, anything but thinking bout suicide.
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>>16814713
Enjoy life as a paraplegic, it'll definitely be less depressing
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>>16814713

What do you mean you can't because you don't have a license? The goal is to be dead when it's over, they can't exactly arrest a corpse. Not that that sounds like a very good way to go anyway, I've heard that pills are the most comfy so you should do a little research and see if you can get your hands on some. Should do the trick as long as you don't try to OD somewhere where people will find you instantly since it's very easy to save someone if they catch it in time.

Or...
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File: hnnnnnnnnng.jpg (115 KB, 2000x1000) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
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I need some help. I got a very important math test tomorrow. I was unable to review it due to studying other subjects I literally knew nothing about. I need some help understanding at least the formula and Mathematic term of mid to advanced algebra.

Here's what I know:
>Add, subtract, multiply, divide
>Decimals, fractions, negative numbers.
>Percents, price increase/decrease, parenthesis
What I don't know:
>simpify: (8.76*10^9)(6.52*10^-3)/13.27*10^5
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17 replies and 4 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>16814670
Holy shit Op how old are you?

>inb4 18
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Holy shit are you in 7th grade?
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>>16814731
>>16814747
Hivemind.

File: 1450550874089.gif (4 MB, 298x150) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
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I want to fuck my cousin..

Any tips?
13 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>16814592
Yeah, use your dick
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From someone who fucked his aunt twice, it's easier than some random chick.
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>>16814601
Greentext pls

File: 1455072768112.jpg (14 KB, 400x300) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
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So I've been in a relationship for 3 years and now I'm about to end my senior year of highschool. My girlfriend didn't finish highschool because of financial issues but just got her GED. I love her more than my family at this point and she's my best friend. I just don't know if long distance will work. I'll be at a university and she'll be attending community college. Is college just better while single in general or should I try to save my relationship? I've never had a tougher choice in my life..
21 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>16814434
Long distance relationship never works. Its common sense. Do what you have to do.
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Don't vreak up! Me and my now wife dated 2 years as a ldr without ever meeting we met on twitter and we was a ldr for 2 years like I said then we met and everything was perfect we was together for 3 years and she was in college but I wasn't i was training to be a professional Wrestler and then we went into a ldr again when I was signed by a Japanese wrestling company and so we was in ldr another year now I'm back state side and I'm signed onto a nice wrestling promotion I make around $70,000 a year and she teaches P.E making around $40,000 a year and were...
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>>16814434
You can try but LDR are always hard, unless you're deeply in love and find it easy to be faithful and loyal to your SO.

If you believe you need to enjoy the "college experience" single then end it before it's too late and try not to whine if things don't work out as you thought. That's the risk you'll have to face.

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Hey adv, I have a friend who is depressed (and a 4channer), could you give me some images or links i could use to brighten his day? pls
21 replies and 14 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>16814361
Perhaps a the light from a shotgun blast to the face will cheer him up :)
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You could kill him and dance on the body. That cheers me up every time. And sometimes the bodies as well.
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>>16814390
I'll suggest to try that, thanks :)

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How does one get a job if they're fresh out of high school with no work experience?
30 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>16814359
>if they're fresh out of high school
You must be joking if you think that's a problem at your age. Just go to a fast food or retail job or if you're really lucky and can land one, an office job
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>>16814359

by applying to every single job, even ones they dont want or know they wont get. this way you at least get the chance to interview and learn how to properly do an interview.

ask your parents, ask your friends, ask your friends parents, ask your teachers, ask every single employee of every single store you enter if they know anywhere thats hiring (though make good small talk with the employees first).

most every job i had before this one i got based on a recommendation.
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>>16814376
nobody will hire us anymore
nobody fuckign wants us
so many places use some bullshit "online application" process that's pretty much copypaste everywhere and you are never sure if anyone will ever even see your name or if it worked right.
>go in person
yeah, nah
that doesn't work anymore
nobody wants us anymore

I met a girl that looks exactly like jessica alba
I'm 25 (but look 20-22)
I'm hoping she is at least 19 but she might as well be 16-17.

>What to do if she is younger than 19?
>Also even if she is 19, would she be too young for me?

It's not everyday one finds a qt3.14 of such proportions and potential.
13 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>16814344
Just talk to her and find out. If her actual age bothers you enough then stop. The only thing you will actually regret is never talking to her.
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Get used to jail, creep
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why would you want a 16 yearold who looks like a 34 yearold?

What are the best condoms? Pic related is what I usually buy but they're not doing it for me anymore

I've tried some other "ultra thin" Trojans but they're shitty too. I can't not use condoms for reasons although soon she's getting an implant contraceptive.

For the time being, recommend me some good condoms
15 replies and 2 images submitted. Click here to view.
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Kimono Micro Thin
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I used romed's. Cheapest, shittiest brand out there. They make gloves and thermometers. Felt like fucking with a car tie around muh dick, but I could last a long time.
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>>16814223
I don't need to last a long time
My issue is I last too long using these shitty condoms

File: anxiety-image.jpg (271 KB, 1536x1024) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
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I will call my doctor tomorrow but I'll write it anyway since yesterday i'm having extreme anxiety attacks or wathever they are, they just come out of the blue and they are very intense, they last about 30/40 minutes. I feel dread, confused, paranoid and mildly dazed, I keep having weird extremely pessimistic thoughts accompanied by slight headache and nausea. Anyone ever experienced this?
12 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>16814131

One many years ago, its pretty awful. Eliminate the stress factors in your life if you can.
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>>16814149
jesus christ, I felt like I was dying, and couldn't think straight but yeah it's probably due to stress conditions
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>>16814192

I thought I was having a heart attack, but then some logic kicked in. It helps to focus on breathing, or at least so I have heard.

File: 5225666435_butterface[1].png (208 KB, 356x368) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
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There's this girl who lives in the town over from me. She's down to fuck, even without any further strings attached.

Problem is, she's got crazy butterface, and while I haven't got much else going on and would love to sleep with her, we share a lot of friends on facebook, and she's the type of person who's always posting pictures of the people she's hanging out with and shit.

How can I get my hands on her without her posting pictures of us hanging out to facebook? If I go over there, it'll likely involve me spending the night,...
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11 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>16814105
Oh, if it's not obvious, I don't want people to know I'm fucking this girl. Given how we only slightly know each other through different people, it's likely gonna give the game away if I'm so much as seen at her place.
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>>16814105
Wear a mask
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>>16814117
Well I doubt she's going to fuck me if she knows I'm ashamed to be seen with her.

File: 1452473013008.jpg (405 KB, 2272x1704) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
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my family makes me want to commit
what should I do?
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I'm too emotionally attached to my parents but they have been verbally and emotionally abusive for most of my life and my dad threatened to kill me with him once.
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Commit to what
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>>16814088
>my dad threatened to kill me with him once.

And you didn't immediately pick a knife and kill your dad?

Seriously, people, did you not learn fucking ANYTHING from Buddhism? If you meet your father, kill your father. If you meet the Buddha, kill the Buddha.

And no, I am NOT joking.
Fucking hell.

File: 1433063326753.jpg (3 MB, 3000x2000) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
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My estranged father just contacted me last night.

We haven't spoken for a decade after the end of an exceedingly messy 8-year custody battle following the divorce of my parents when I was 4 years old.
I've only imagined that he's hated me for deserting him ever since.

I'm just short of 22 now, and a complete fucking wreck.
I've no motivation to do anything with what remains of my life and I've no friends to speak of.
The half of my family that "won" me in court a decade ago clearly all feel disillusioned with what...
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11 replies and 3 images submitted. Click here to view.
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plz respon
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>>16814028
how did he reach out?
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>>16814165
Sent a conversation request on FB-messenger; No message.

File: 1367247256001.jpg (65 KB, 500x657) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
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Stay with me here, /adv/:

>in the near future, casual sex with a small number of close friends who for the most part will be the norm (see e.g. the rates for 18-29y/o casual sex going up, while the # of sexual partners goes down)
>people will still date seriously and couple up, and your group of FWBs will be part of what you have to offer your s.o.; so the more attractive, the better
>people in these groups will be more tight-knit and better at sharing resources because sex = social...
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19 replies and 3 images submitted. Click here to view.
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You can go anything if you put your mind to it. Don't give up OP. Stay strong.
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sounds like a nightmare.

also what about sex robots and vr n' shiet
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>>16814068
people who use those will be more likely to fail to breed and therefore disappear... eventually.

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