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Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1443. page
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File: 1456105013887.jpg (31 KB, 428x376) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
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At what age should I be worried I don't have a girlfriend?

I know some people say "Just wait for it" But like, When should I stop waiting?
30 replies and 3 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>16870519
You gotta go get a girlfriend

if I know one thing in this world it's that girls almost never ask guys out.
>>
>>16870519
How old are you?
>>
>>16870519
At the risk of sounding cryptic, when you're ready.

Have a job? Have your own place? Then it's time.

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>girlfriend drunktexts me that she wants to have sex this weekend
>unbeknownst to her i am a 25 year old virgin

Alright folks, how do I proceed from here without fucking this up to high hell

I figure step 1 is to clean the shit out of my apartment
21 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>16870437
Tell her you are a virgin. Tell her that you haven't had sex. Tell her that you have never been in a sexual intercourse.

Being a virgin is stupid concept and it shouldn't matter. Yeah, it's your first time, but most likely you've seen some porn and you know the general concept.

Caress her and touch her erogenous zones. Ask her what she likes, that'll get you far.
>>
>>16870437
Step 1. Clean yourself
step 2. Clean your apartment.
Step 3. >>16870467
>>
>>16870467
Fucking doesn't come naturally to some people. I'm pretty shit at it

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How do I tell my crazy left-wing parents that I'm a right-wing libertarian?
30 replies and 2 images submitted. Click here to view.
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Start with "I have this problem that I haven't been talking to you about, I'm sorry, but I've gone to the dark side," continue from there.
>>
Maybe they're not authoritarian. If you discuss politics go for that first.
>>
>>16870311
Goose-step into the living room with your best business suit and loudly proclaim "The free-market will fix everything!", march back to your room and masturbate to ayn rand again.

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Girl here;

Anyone have tips on cheating on the boyfriend and not getting caught?
21 replies and 5 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>16869887
Come on man, really? You're better than that. I know you're better than that. This was lame.

0/10
>>
>>16869895
wow rude
>>
Don't be a slut.

Also, ok bait, made me reply.

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I left my last job because my boss was a major asshole.

>Why did you leave your last job?

How do answer this on an application without lying?
21 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>16869690
Unfair treatment? Poor management? Just expect that if you get an interview to explain it.
>>
>>16869692
Does stating, "Communicating with the President proved difficult and timely," scream ineptitude?

I received two $1 raises in the first five months...is stating that a good or bad idea (in a cover letter)? Also, in my exit interview, he asked what he could do to get me to stay (multiple times)...is that okay to state; I have considered saying something along the lines of, "Fully trained replacement, as I turned down the President's request for me to stay."

good/bad/????
>>
>>16869690
By "lying" through omission? You can tell them other things that are true.

>I didn't feel there was a lot of room for growth, and I want to take a step forward with my career.

Not a lot a room for growth because your boss is a fucking asshole (they don't need to know that).

My ex messaged me asking to be friends again, and I've been hanging out and chatting with her on a daily basis for a month now... It was stupid of me since it was inevitable that I would catch feelings again even though she has a boyfriend. How do I get over her?
27 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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Don't do it OP.

They're your EX for a reason...
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>>16869424
Dude dude dude no. I fucking got dumped a week ago and I fucking know better than you. Dont fucking contact her at all.
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>>16869424
>even though she has a boyfriend
Holy shit dude, you must really love torturing yourself anon :( Don't do that..

>How do I get over her?
You accept that it's over. This process will take time and it will hurt, there's sadly no way around it. Take a week off and lie crying in bed all day and after a month or so you'll be better. That's the way and everybody who had a serious relationship will agree with me. Accept the...
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Where do you go when you don't have friends and live in a rural town without a car? I haven't left my house in 5 months and I'm starting to feel like I'm getting cabin fever.

I'd go on a walk, but I'd just be aimlessly wandering around and there really isn't anything to see.
23 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>16869402
>I'd just be aimlessly wandering around and there really isn't anything to see.
That's because you're all in your head nigga. There's always something nice to see no matter where you are.
>>
Oh, and I also don't have an expendable income, and this area is so rural that there isn't even public transportation.

Am I doomed to isolation?
>>
>>16869417
But.. I mean, literally, there's nothing I haven't seen before. I've walked around this town hundreds of times, lived here for most of my life. I've seen it all.

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Disney movies make me sad. So much happiness in such a cold world. Is there justifiable reason to kill yourself when you've been suffering consistently for 20 years? I mean we're all going to die anyway, and I'd rather be in control. Soon I will probably be homeless when my abusive family kicks me out and I have two lumps on my head that may be cancer. I also know that every human is fucking suffering and that makes me feel deep sadness. The future is hopeless and I am trapped in my own bull shit and misery. I will never be sexually involved with a girl. I'm...
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Why are you watching Disney movies?
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>>16869053
is that relevant?
>>
>>16869065
Of course it is.

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Just found out my gf is pregnant yesterday. No idea what ill do. I never really pictured marrying her. She won't even consider an abortion. I feel like my life is over. I have no idea how this happened she was on the pill and i almost always pull out
178 replies and 24 images submitted. Click here to view.
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Fake death, start life in another state/country under new identity.
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She prob fucked another guy, im sorry anon
Get a test and gtfo if it isn't yours, thats really all you can hope for
>>
>>16868774

>almost always

I'm laughing way too hard at this.

Honestly bro, man up and take care of your child. Your life is far from over; it will just change. Being a father will help develop you into more of a man and will give you a chance to pass your knowledge onto your children.

Such as always pull out.

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Is it shallow to leave my boyfriend over a bad sex life?

>together 2 years, lived together for 1
>took his virginity
>was ok at first, then had anxiety/erection issues
>worked through it, then had troubles lasting
>more erection issues
>has trouble finishing too quickly still
>has basically no control over his dick, forget me even trying to cum vaginally

Sex...
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29 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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Honestly it seems like every guy I've been with has had this problem. I'm starting to think that decent sex is just a myth.

If you can find a guy that lasts during sex don't ever let him go.

You probably should leave him, and really hope you can find a decent guy.
>>
My opinion, based on what you just wrote, is that you wouldn't be in the wrong for wanting to leave him. Honestly, if nothing is working out, maybe you two aren't meant for each other.
>>
>>16868594
No honestly.
Or you could play with toys and try new things in bed (hint hint).

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My gf said I could do anal with her ONLY if I let her finger me during sex. Is this worth it? I'm pretty nervous about this.
28 replies and 2 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>16868503
Duh. You might even like it.
Just don't forget to prepare your anuses properly, both of you.
>>
>>16868510
Des just a finger feel good. My past experience with anal "stimulation" was awful. I have anal scarring .
>>
OP, I hate to say this, but the odds are good that this is a bluff. She doesn't want to do this at all, but doesn't want to come out looking like the limiting factor either, so she offered a trade that she thinks you won't take.

Call the bluff or not, as you choose, but don't take the deal unless you're prepared to see it through.

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How the fuck do people move out? It's literally fucking impossible you need like 2000 dollars for a car another 2000 to start renting and then an apartment is like 800 a month.

I live with literally the shittiest parents ever and I need to get the fuck out. They stay up until like 3 am slamming doors and yelling and talking and then they wake up at like 9 and cook a shit load of smelly food and then they just sleep all day after ruining my sleep. The entire house is old as fuck and broken down filled with mold and asbestos and the Windows all leak a shit load of...
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27 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>16868342
have you tried explaining your problem to them?
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>>16868349
Yes they don't care
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>>16868351
have you tried flipping out and really having a go at them? if someone in my house was being this annoying i would flip my shit. of course they are your parents and you should respect them but it just sounds like they are being pathetic.

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My boyfriend's toilet is filled to the brim with shit. 2 weeks worth of piss and shit and his house stinks. He hasn't changed the bed sheets in over 5 months, the bath has soap scum building and noticed that he doesn't do basic chores.
He believes because he works, this is normal and that most people do not upkeep their homes if they work... He spends most of his weekends and weeknights on the couch when he's not working.

When I ask him to do these things, he tells me I am nagging. When he does these things, he points them out and wants me to...
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112 replies and 10 images submitted. Click here to view.
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That's disgusting. If you want to spend your life wiping his ass, keep him around.

We all have different levels of cleanliness (me: shiny, my SO: tidy). You work it out and compromise. But I've lived with people like him and they are disgusting. In fact, one got an horrific mouth infection from never fucking cleaning and chewing on her filthy hands. Gag.
>>
>>16868206
He's a manchild. Really gross.
>>
>>16868206

>my boyfriend can't flush a toilet

I think your boyfriend is clinically retarded

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>I literally have no hobbies in life.
All my current "hobbies" are considered half-assed or i don't even do them right. Let's just say its like this- My friend's hobby is anime, and he watches it very well (finishing around 700 series) so he has a type of "achievement" of his hobby,proof that he really likes watching anime.
Everyone has something they are really good at. Me? i don't know what my "hobbies" are although i do like something like "technology" yet i lack enough study or...
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22 replies and 3 images submitted. Click here to view.
>>
What do you like?
My hobbies:
>drawing
>writing
>making greentext lists
>hiking
>etc.
>>
>>16867922

Watching 700 series of anime isn't an achievement anon, it's incredibly sad

And hobbies are down to your own sense of achievement, not what some clown thinks
>>
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seems to me like "hobbies" are a way to get you to buy shit you don't need to make others money or else you only have an "interest"

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I'm 19, been seeing my girlfriend for a month and a half now, was a virgin before her( guess I still kind of am) tried having sex a couple of times like a week in with a condom but I just flopped after , but thought it was just the condom. Now tried it without one and couldn't stay hard, I lose it very fast when I go on top, I put the tip in like twice in and out when I was on top but then just flopped. What's wrong with me? I lose my hard on within like a few seconds if there's no stimulation so I lose it before she even puts it in when she's on top...
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20 replies and 2 images submitted. Click here to view.
>>
Stop masturbating and watching porn. Unless you enjoy ed. Also run more.
>>
Yeah don't fap but are you stressed? Nervous? I get stage fright when I'm with a new girl so maybe you're just freaked out.

My first girlfriend was super nice and would put on the condom for me. Was sexy and stress free.
>>
Try not being on top. It's proven that increased blood flow in that position is bad for keeping an erection.
Let her be top, and keep the room temperature a little bit cold. Child will help keep the blood vessels constricted, and keep your erection up.

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