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Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1047. page
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How do affirmations work? People say a positive affirmation will make you more conscious of opportunities to make it happen, but wouldn't it just attract evidence to where you actually start to believe it? If you tell yourself you are rich, how does that make it more likely?
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it doesn't, the law of attraction isn't real.
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>>16989559

>People say a positive affirmation will make you more conscious of opportunities to make it happen

Its pretty much bullshit they put in pamphlets and on the cover of self-help books to trick you into spending 100$ on tickets on a seminar to see some asshole in a suit tell you what a special person you are.

If you want something, work for it, and even then there's a chance you won't achieve it.

That's the law of the universe. Luck + Preparation....
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you're just pumping yourself up psychologically. some people can do it, others can't.

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I GOT GUM IN MY PUBES AND I CANT GET IT OUT ITS MINTY AND ITS BURNING AWAY AT MY CLIT I THINK HELP THIS WAS A BAD
IDEA ABORT
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Dry off your pubes.
Get a handful of olive oil and soak your pubes in it.
The gum should come off.

How did you get gum on your pubes?
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>>16989539
THIS IS SUPER HELPFUL AND ILL TRY IT NOW...

Don't ask it was a weird home waxing treatment gone wRONG
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throw some peanut butter on that gum

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I have a thing for pregnant girls, girls who look pregnant(like when they have food babies and shit), and girls who are thicc and have a belly.

Is this fucked up? How do I possibly tell my girlfriend about this? She seems to really want to please me in any way possible but I still feel weird telling her. I told her about my impregnation fetish and she said "that's really weird" but not in a way where she seemed she would be against including it in the bedroom somehow.

Also if you have any nice pics feel free to share.
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>>16989338
>impregnation fetish

ITS NOT A FETISH IS LITERALLY THE REASON YOUR PENIS AND VAGINA EXIST REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE GAS THE ILLITERATES
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>>16989338
Pretty normal. Probably an evolution thing, like having "pride" or something that the human race is being furthered.

They make "pads" like that that simulate the appearance of pregnancy. Maybe you can get one and ask her to wear it under her clothes.
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>>16989361

yeah and after she denies your insane request, you can expect divorce papers

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Anons serious question, is this normal?
>I am emotionally attracted to little kids,as in they make me really happy . >Still very rarely when I am around little kids I have weird / sexual thoughts about them.
I feel I'm not a danger to kids cause like I said,being turned on is rare,and when I am I just have a panic attack.
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>>16989326
>is this normal?
No. It may or may not be dangerous, but most people don't get sexually aroused by kids, which means that no, it is not normal. Anyone who says otherwise is some kind of pedophile apologist.

I've read that some researchers believe pedophilia to be a kind of crossed wires--the parts of your brain that should trigger the urge to protect and nurture stimulate boners instead. So you wind up, in your case, with an uncomfortable mix of boners and a sense of emotional closeness. The panic attacks make sense, because you're having feelings you know aren't right.

Do you also feel emotional connection and physical arousal around adults/people your own age? If so, I imagine you can succeed with a reasonable life if you can suppress your not-OK urges. If kids are all that get to you, it will be harder.

But you can prevail. With help. Talk to a shrink. As long as you don't have or work with children, you are not a legal risk.
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>>16989366
I am attracted to people my age,its just I've never desired a relationship with one.
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What do you mean "only rarely" get turned?

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I have post-surgery club feet. I went to get new custom orthopedic insoles made today, and the clerk basically told me my feet will never improve at my age (22) even with exercise and insoles, which are only to prevent deterioration, which is likely to happen as I get older. She also said that I can forget about "elegant" shoes (I'm semi /fa/) and should wear trainers

I then asked about surgery, and she had a good laugh at how everyone would like to be cut open or take a pill nowadays, an easy way, and that I can't do that either because feet recover...
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>>16989315
> I can't even fuckimg express myself properly

I think your autism might be the more pressing concern over your clubbing feet
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>>16989324
thanks
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If you have the opportunity, you should go speak to an actual doctor or surgeon about surgery so that it doesn't get to the point where you can't function (that is, if it's surgery that you want, can afford, and think will be best for you in the long run.) The woman you're describing just sounds like a bitch, and what the hell does she know, anyway? She's not a doctor.

Good luck, OP. I hope it works out for you.

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I just got outta prison, what are all these weird new memes?

What ever happened to the dancing baby?
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>>16989271
Promising start to a thread.
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There is a GIANT and SUPER BRIGHT led sign at some auction place on the edge of my town.

It's blinding and awful enough, but whatever middle aged chucklefuck programs it put this fucking dancing baby on it, and goddamn minions.
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>>16989276
>>16989282

What?


Also, what should I do?

So far I'm eating at every fast food place I see, and I bought a deck of cards (bicycle, so it's really good) just in case anyone I meet wants to play spades.


What is everyone doing for fun these days?

btw, my computer is really fast

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I just cut my own hair without my parents permission and they'll be posed if they see. what should I do?
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Well, since it isn't permanent damage like tattoo or missing limb you will be fine :-D
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Runaway and never look back.

Isnt this something you shoved thought about prior to cutting it?

I've been in this position before and theres nothing you can do but suck up the hate from your parents. They'll get over it once it starts growing out again. I did that when I was 14. I did it before my communion which made my dad even more mad. He didn't talk to me for a month after calling me a "transvestite donkey."

Good luck with the insults, OP. My self-esteem took a plunge since then and I'm not sure i totally recovered 4 years later.
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Wow 18 and your parents don't want you to cut your hair?

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How to deal with being replaced?
I used to hang out with my cousin all the time, but that stopped since he started dating his new girlfriend. Now he does all the things he used to do with me with her, and acts really distant when talking to me.

The worst part is that I live with him and my uncle right now, so it's not very easy to ignore the issue.
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>>16989169
Let me fuck your pussy
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>>16989173

Fuck off retard
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Get your own girlfriend

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I want a Kiwi

How do I get one
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>>16989109
Where do you live?
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>>16989112
Hueland
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>>16989109
You don't dumbass, they're endangered.

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Im not hideous, Ive had gfs in the past, hooked up with girls.

Why when it comes to a girl i like am i such a fucking beta fag?
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>>16989098
Because you're scared of rejection probably. Just start spending more time around her, start conversations with her, etc. Ask her out for coffee or something if that isn't too awkward.
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SOunds like me.

"What if she says no that'll be weird"
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you think shes too good for you/you aint good enough for her
plus you go all nervous and start acting weird
just say fuck it, be you
lose the nervous shit

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I just want to rant

I am 18, soon 19. I am mad sexually frustrated. I lift, I go out, I am pretty sociable (I find it very easy to talk to people, not shy, many friends, etc. but I'm not some ultra-social butterfly), dress well, I go to one of the best schools in the country and just got accepted to a top 25 worldwide university, I flirt with women all the time and they reciprocate. Hell I have women (granted, 4s and 5s) literally chasing my ass sometimes, and have had a few very popular/hot/whatever girls (8s) express interest in me but less explicitly. BUT I have...
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>>16988995
Don't give up you're not alone. I'm 18, also virgin, went through serious depressions and suicide thoughts when all friends began to talk about sex, cutest girls got fucked by older douchebags and I was still unexperienced. Worst was that I actually had girlfriend for 2 years, but I was faggot and she didn't really want it. I live with parents so inviting girl to come over is not possible since I'm never home alone. I guess I can't help you, maybe try to focus on something alse so you...
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Its weird man, how parents make sure you wont get laid

Doesnt that counter the point if being a parent
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>>16989102
yeah, it hurts way more than it should rationally

it's like the ultimate exclusion: no one wants to do the most primal thing on earth with you, so you start doubting your worth as a human being as a whole...

also sometimes it feels like a club that literally everyone around you is getting into except you and they're laughing at you from the inside.

I don't whether I should laugh or what lol

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/adv/, do you let relatively minor lies pass you by?

I don't have many arguments, but when I do it's because I've picked up on a minor lie (via a contradiction in what someone has said) and just can't help but confront it.
I have an incredibly perfect memory of conversation (I'm a Jr doctor, so it also has its pros), even from months and months ago, and no exaggeration, word for word (including prosody)

I'm not sure whether me mentioning them is an issue (that I need to confront), or if it's an issue simply because I pick so many of them up
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>>16988970
People lie everyday. It is part of why we are on the top ahead of other animals.

Personally I never let lies pass by me. But it isn't happening often because
my friends and coworkers aren't lying that much
or I am too dumb to tell diference
or they are good at lying .-D

Until you piss somebody, I don't see it as a problem. Keep broking their bad lies OP!
>>
What kind of contradictions are we talking about?

Is it I was taking a shit at 8 PM but it was actually 7:30 PM? Small things like that?
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>>16988994
Well I guess they say good liars have good memories... But the issue arises because liars have to consciously lie, which is cognitively pretty demanding to keep up with

>>16988996
More like 5pm vs 9pm

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I've been really down on myself lately. I'm in sort of a no-man's land as far as my state of mind.

I'm a 28 y/o male, and I think the main source of all my depression is my failed marriage and never having gone to college.

>Marriage
I don't know. I married the first girl I slept with, I enlisted to take care of us, we had a kid, she met someone else online, divorced me, has since remarried and my daughter doesn't even know my face anymore.

I feel like I'm stuck providing for a family without...
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>>16988966
>College (con't because I digressed)
I don't even know where to begin. I know I at the very least want an associates in something so I can get a better job. (One of the things I am thankful for in my life is my job, a situation which could be much worse given my lack of credentials)

But is it too late to enroll in university? Live the Greek life? I sometimes worry my ambitions are eclipsed by my reality. Is there a limit to how old you can be before persueing a post...
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>I never got to enjoy a life of my own
Why can't you? Do you have the GI bill?
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>>16988987
Nope. Got screwed out of it.

And I can't have a life of my own because I'm a dad. No matter where I go or what I do I'll always be a dad.

And truth be told, I love my daughter, but I fucking hate children. I don't even like the idea of long term relationships; the idea of being around one person for that long makes me nauseous.

The real sad thing is 18, 19, 20, 21, 22 year old me knew all of this. But he got married and all that what not because "it's what you...
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Need some quick and to the point advice:

>girl at work who is single
>she's cute, shy, nerdy and not one of those club sluts
>I manned up and asked her out
>She said yes, I gave her my number
>Later on she messages me on facebook (didn't add my number) saying her grandad (who she's close to) passed away a few days ago and she needs to prepare for a funeral
Wow, I have great timing right?
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Dead end m8

Just turn around and go down a new road.
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>>16988798
>gets away

You never had a chance, dude. You tried but she's not into you.
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I think you could give it one last try, but it sounds like either she's not into you or not interested in a relationship.

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Ever since I was a kid about 5-6 years old, I've have had thoughts of killing people. I've always been an introvert, even though I have/had friends I've always liked being alone. But being alone seems to make me think of killing people, because I always think of the mistakes myself and others have done. I always get anxiety and nervousness with people, including friends and family members, so therefore I always want to avoid them. And whenever I'm around them(or people in general), my anxiety turns to anger, and angry thoughts I have repeat in my head. It...
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>>16988754
As a pretty normal adult that has fantasized about killing people hundreds/thousands of times, I'm pretty sure everyone does this and neither of us are special dark snowflakes at all.
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Um, I have never fantasized about killing anyone in my entire life.

I have wanted to hit people in the face when they were being dicks, though.
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>>16988754
Kill yourself

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