I figured we could use an counterpart to the drawfriend threads. Come write, criticize, make requests, do whatever.
If you're a writefriend just post a link to your pastebin or whatever and I'll post it at the beginning of new threads.
>>636993
I'm sure Toggle won't mind if I post some of his work.
Here's some dark souls smut 1/4
>>636997
2/4
>>636998
3/4
>>636999
4/4
>>636993
Requesting this
Alright requesting something with maggie pesky, maybe run a train on her with her entire class.
>>637175
Yeah I still haven't gotten around to MGSV but here's something to stop this thread from dieing.
I am a traitor. A traitor and a whore, surrounded by like minded individuals, all worshipping what we once hated. And yet, before today I'd never felt more alive.
The thought crept across my mind as I watched another soldier throw herself at the boss, desperate to gleam some form of affection from his cold, solid eye. I'd be right there with her, trying to make it a three way if I hadn't given up months ago. Sure when I'd first gotten here I'd done all the new recruits did, pining for the boss' affection. Constant requests for sparring led to requests for a date until finally it became as desperate as requests in front of open closets, "Oh boss, why not come into this fox hole?" Guh. In hindsight that one could've used work. But then after a few weeks, it all boiled down into a simmering pile of regret. You can only throw yourself at the feet of someone you wanted to fuck for so long before you leave and look for fresh meat.
Speaking of fresh meat, I'd decided to go find that idiot I had been dating... whatever his name was and fuck his brains out. Every female soldier came to that point eventually, along with a hatred of that bitch in the bikini. Even being near the boss was enough to get them weak in the knees, desperate to fill that loneliness with one walking dildo or another. I could attest that there was more fucking going on in this base than in the entirety of greece at any given moment. Thank god boss'd been 'recruiting' more men than women or we'd have a real problem real fast.
'Uh, Janet? helloooo?' a few words in a frustrating high voice from in front of me snapped me out of the trance I was in walking to my quarters. I was fucking soaked, and of course the last idiot who I'd been casually fucking had decided to let another woman hop on him, which was a damn shame since he had a nice cock.
>>637415
Now here was this melvin looking mother fucker 4 feet from her door. Dumb orange hair, fuckton of acne, thick stupid looking glasses. At this moment in time though, janet just didn't care, she was a god damn waterfall and listening to the soft moans from around the ship were not helping. She grabbed the idiot by the tie and threw him in, eliciting a startled squawk of protest.
'Pants off, now' It was all she'd bothered to say to him, but it was enough. The ginger who's name she couldn't recall if she wanted to began scrambling to strip off the jeans before he'd even given it a second thought. underneath, the underwear included an impressive bulge, not as much as she'd imagined boss having but still more impressive than the standard around the base. She greedily helped herself, impaling it as far into her throat as she could go without choking to death, tempted on by the soft whimpers and moans of the dork she'd snagged. Once she'd gone as far as she could go, she let it all out for a quick gulp of air before rocking her head back and forth on the impressive member, letting her tongue flick across the head in the front and along the balls at the back. Every soldier learned pretty quickly how to give a whore level blowjob in some desperate hope that bedding the boss would be possible if word had spread that they were the best lay on the base. It never worked, but that didn't stop them from studying every nerve to press, every gland to rub, every small kink to add something to their own technique and make them stand out among their peers. Swallow never spit, maintain eye contact, moan when they hit the back of your throat, clean after cumming to get them hard again, even how to act after drinking down a load so that they'd want to go the rest of the way.
>>637415
>>637474
>>637474
For just a moment, as the orange fuzz tickled her face, and the rod began to choke her, janet could black out just enough to imagine that it was boss who was choking her with his hard rod, looking down on her with the same steely expression she'd always seen, always seeming to demand more and more of her. She could feel the twitches as the load shot down into her stomach, pump after pump. she slowly pulled the cock out of her stretched throat coughing lightly, it'd been too long since she'd done that. she started gently lapping at the side of the rod, cleaning her spit and leftover jizz off as the member started to grow hard again. She had to admit, part of sucking some random scientist off kind of turned her on.
At long damn last he was hard enough to fuck. she pushed him on the bed, caring little for his stammers of protest. She started to mount him, driving his hot solid member deeper and deeper into her wet, soaking cunt. she bounced on his cock, trying to trick herself into thinking that it was that of the one she worshipped, coaxing the rod as far as it could go, desperate to climax and cure her of this madness that consumed her. She turned around, forcing the face of the dork underneath her out of her vision and slowly out of her mind she lost herself in the pleasure of being truly filled. Finally she could feel the build up of the encroaching orgasm as it began to rock her mind and roll her hips. He started to cum underneath her, and finally it exploded like a firework in her mind as it spurted deep within her. she fell on top of the spent scientist, gasping for air herself. she slowly pulled him out of her.
>>637521
Ok.. now I'm done.
>>637527
there isn't really anywhere to go... except maybe a three way or just full blown fetish fuel.
>>637552
Yeah I guess you're right. I really like the way you described their descent into what they are now.
>>637175
It would be cool if more than one person took a crack at this. Seeing how their style differs would be neat.
>>637626
I agree
Found this one looking around.
http://pastebin.com/KiAux2Ez
I have an idea/concept request but it's kinda the worst kinda idea/concept request. A multi-character cross-over idea/concept request.
>>643650
What is it?
>>643667
The basic idea is an orgy with 4 different teachers from different shows and a bunch of dudes fucking them as some sort of best teacher award thing.
>>643679
Nice. What teachers from what shows?
>>643679
I'm not seeing how that's a reward.
Moreover established characters with random faceless fucking devices is just stupid.
>>643690
If you check out the drawthread you probably already know.
Ms. Baker from Clarence.
Ms. Keane from PPG.
Principal Waxelplax from FOP
Ms Butterbean from Billy and Mandy.
If it's worth doing I'll make a more detailed request, but I don't think anyone would be all that interested in it.
>>643712
That's what I figured. I was thinking in cartoonporn rules, like there's some secret teaching society that helps lonely teachers and dumb shit like that. It's too late to take it back though. Oh well.
>>643713
god, like pulling teeth with you. I'll see where I'm at mentally in 12 hours. Maybe I'll do it.
>>643717
It makes more sense that such a secret society would keep the "rewards system" in house.
>>643721
Sorry. Not trying to cause you grief. Just not feeling super confident about it. Give me a minute.
>>643725
Again. Stupid cartoonporn rules with free love and spontaneous fucking and all that. I'll try to put some thought into it.
>>643727
ugh I'm just tired. it's 6:30 am here. That's why I said 12 hours, Im going to bed. then I'll see what I can do.
>>643743
Ok. If need references, or more information let me know. I'm writing up a request thing if that helps.
>>643760
Alright I'm awake and much more sober
I'd always respected teachers. If I had to deal with snot nosed brats for 6 hours a day I'd have a gun in my mouth in 2 weeks but they stick with it. Sure some of them were bitter cynics, not far from my own reaction, but most of them were in it for the teaching. So I thought it was a crying shame that most of them hadn't gotten laid since picking up the mantle. So I decided, what the hell, right? might as well help them out. I might be just one man but I can gather some people in the same boat and make a day of it. Simple enough to do, like minded individuals were few but there were plenty of former students ( and a few current ones) who were interested, so after a few phone calls I had my little gathering.
The thing about a surprise orgy though, especially when your doing it with people who have to constantly fight for respect, is that if you just lead the women into a room full of dicks, they'll just laugh it off as a joke 9/10 times. You have to make sure that they are in the perfect mood for it, or they won't even give it a thought. thankfully, give a teacher an apple and she'll eat it. well, she will if someone steals her lunch from the locker that happens to be impossible to close right. Load the apple with enough aphrodisiac to make an asexual cream their pants, and they'll be in the 'right mood' all day, but you don't want them to be at that level for hours at a time without release either. This is supposed to be a little fun, not a pedophilia charge. the solution? Three hour time release based on each of the teachers respective body weight.
>>645613
Phases one and two went without a hitch, but it was phase three that had me nervous. calling the 4 into room 21b, timing it perfectly so that the aphrodisiac would just be hitting them, and making it sound as unsuspicious as possible to sneak 26 or so fully grown men, and getting 4 teachers away from their posts, as close to dismissal as humanly possible, would be tricky. it had to be timed down to the second, and at 2:59:34 the call was placed.
There were a few reactions from the at first startled teachers, ms butterbean managing to get in a breif "what the he-" before all three of them simultaneously stopped, and began to pant, the aphrodisiacs hitting them like a train. Noting the signal the group gathered already, stripped off the small amount of clothing, presenting their members. as if in a trance, eyes ravenous and wide, all 4 found a cock that they seemed drawn to. mrs. kean seemed to go for the larger one, almost following some long forgotten primal instinct before taking it to the very hilt. Clearly this had not been her first rodeo, which had left me shocked. she seemed to be an incorruptible flower of joy and innocence, tolerant and patient to a fault, but here she was deepthroating like a champ.
>>645791
The others weren't far behind, ms baker seemed to be more focused on the testes of the one next to ms. keane instead of the meat itself, but the way she ran her tongue over it seemed to keep him on edge the entire time, driving him mad with pleasure as she licked and sucked for all she could. Letting them rest gently on her tongue, suckling them into her mouth, resting them gingerly on her face as she lost herself to her own thing. Ms butter bean reaction was the most surprising. she seemed to know what was going on, but didn't seem to know what she was doing. underneath the slightly bitter exterior beat the heart of a virgin and all that I geuss. She took her time removing article after article of clothing, glaring at the occasional participant telling her to hurry up as she shook nervously, with the occasional hollow threat that she'd leave.
Finally the panties fell to the floor and she stood, slightly shivering nude for the onlookers to see. She followed ms. kean and baker's example, picking one of the "smaller" participants (5in) and loudly sucking him off to the awaiting public. now as all this was going on Principal Waxplax had dropped all pretenses, jumped out of her clothing and onto the first participant she'd laid eyes on. Ass jiggling and breasts rubbing the face of the lucky bastard underneath her, slowly losing all feeling in his pelvic region, as she slammed up and down again and again, thrusting him deeper and deeper into her, faster and faster. As the sound of flesh on flesh began to fill the room, punctuated only by the occasional gag from ms keane, moan from ms baker or slurp from ms butterbean.
>>645828
As the thrusting grew faster and louder, Waxplax began to beckon the others toward her, rubbing and sucking the other participants to her hearts content, trying to put even ms Kean to shame with her ability. Not to be outdone, ms kean began to mount the man she'd chosen and bounce with reckless abandon, lust filling her face as a fire she didn't know she had was being put out between her legs.
' Hey!' an already cuming Waxplax shouted 'want to make this interesting? At the end of this, the one who gets the least of them to cum, has to "clean up".'
Kean, dunk with pleasure that she was, knew what "clean up" referred to, and yelled a simple 'you're on' as she beckoned another three to keep pace with her. Sure waxplax had a blend of desperation and lust pent up in her to the point where she didn't even need the apple in the first place, but kean had a dormant beast she'd kept caged up for years just aching to burst free, and the technique to match it.
' you girls don't know who you're dealing with' jeered ms baker, finally over her balls fetish, hair and face covered in jizz with someone already inside her. she put her head on his chest, spread her cheeks and yelled 'who wants to take a crack at this?' showing a slightly agape anus, stretched from what must have been nightly sessions for years. It didn't take long before she had her first volunteer, gathering 3 more around her to put up a more than decent competition against the principal and teacher.
Ms butterbean this entire time was still loudly slurping her first, and he was growing rather bored of it. He decided to spice it up with a little surprise deepthroat, while calling out ' well, I suppose we have a contest then. Loser has to "clean up" the winners outside-' glancing down at ms butterbean,'-and in' finally finishing in her throat.
>>645934
The competition grew fierce as the three teachers threw every talent they had, draining the balls of participant after participant, the air growing thick with moans and heavy with sex as the orgy persisted. Ms butterbean quickly gagged on the seed in her mouth and spat it on the floor.
'My, my, seems you're about to lose this little competition. hope you like the taste of muff.' Ms butterbean stopped gagging.
' how would you.' she began, spreading her legs 'like to be the one' she spread her pussy ' who breaks my hymen?'
With a thrust and a slight squeal of protest from ms butterbean he was in her, snapping through flesh and sinew, plowing her depths as far as he could, feeling her innards as deep as possible as he thrusted in and out, slowly at first and faster and faster as he found a perfect rhythm, turning her screams and grunts into moans as she got closer and closer to the first orgasm she'd ever had without her fingers. Finally she could feel the wave of pleasure wash over her and squirted all over him.
Ms butterbean sighed content, noting that he had stopped thrusting and was waiting for her to finish, an almost condescending look on his face. he slowly pulled out of her and sat down, gesturing for her to mount him herself. ms butterbean hesitated. she could see that she was quickly losing to the three in the other side of the room, but even then she wasn't sure what to do, caught between the pleasure of that last orgasm and the exhaustion caused by it, decideing weather or not to catch her breath or just bolt.
>>646076
After a few seconds of hesitation she finally got up and mounted the legs of her partner, slowly inserting the rod into her, gently bouncing up and down on it as she began to get into the swing of things losing herself a second time to the pleasure bombarding her, cumming again and again, picking up speed as it began to resonate in her, until finally she could feel his thrusts start to resonate with her own penetrating deeper than he had when he or she were thrusting alone. It started to get faster, with him grabbing her ass and forcing her to go faster and more in sync with his own thrusts, faster and faster, the rhythmic slapping of flesh seemed to drown out the world around ms butterbean as she began to lose herself in the middle of one long continuous orgasm, until she felt it. everything froze for just a beat and she could feel him cumming inside her, pushing her over the edge one last time. Ms butterbean stood up, slowly dismounting the already drained man, limp cock flopping out of her tight pussy. It was as if a switch had been flipped deep inside, and the show had granted the attention of every member of the room not already busy occupied with one of the other three. ms butterbean gently cleared her throat and spread her legs.
'next' she said in the sweetest voice she could manage.
>>646153
The next 5 hours were a blur of amazing sex, earth shaking orgasms, momentary blackouts, experimental makeouts, wet snowballs, licking jizz and the occasional odd fetish indulged from one of the more bizarre participants. All 4 of them were in a bliss that they hadn't felt in years, for ms butterbean a bliss that she had never felt before. At roughly 8pm everyone, even myself, had cum 2 or 3 times in or from each hole, and couldn't anymore if they wanted to. Exhausted we began to disperse, count of who made who came more lost a long time ago. Thankfully, over that 5 hours ms butterbean had discovered her own fetishes, and began lick the three teachers clean, running the cum and sweat across her tongue as she went, savouring every drop before gulping it down with reckless abandon, working her way closer and closer to the first, ms bakers, flower.
She began running her tongue along the inside savouring the taste of pussy and sperm as she felt it in the back of her skull down to her dripping loins. After she couldn't taste semen no matter how far she ran her tongue, she moved down to the well used anus, semen slightly leaking already. As ms butterbean kept cleaning ms baker slowly stirred into consciousness, and orgasmed one last time into mrs butterbeans waiting mouth.
Ms butterbean licked her lips and looked to the other two, eagerly awaiting their own turns, 'we should do this every friday'
>>646184
I was kinda hoping this would be a bit more consensual overall, but you did a great job. Thanks again for doing this and I hope to see more from you in the future.
Are we already at the end of the line for this thread?
>>646403
no prob. Meant to be more of a social awkwardness than rapey but, yea more a dive into what I'm into.
Would anyone mind terribly if I posted ideas for a lewd!King of the Hill universe? No actual requests or anything but just ravings and brainstorming of a concept.
Last gasp.
>>648668
Fuck it. Here's what I got. It's not that well thought out, but nothing's gonna come from it anyway so fuck.
*Note:Bobby and co exist, but aren't affected and/or involved in anyway*
Basically the lewd KOTH world isn't as prudish about sex.(Duh) It's kinda like everyone compromised with the free love hippies, sex education was more accepted and comprehensive, safe sex products have been greatly improved. Shit like that. Even so, Hank can still be a bit of a stick in the mud and has to be talked into doing particularly kinky stuff. Still There are lines he won't cross though, like he won't fuck Miss Liz, Didi or Luanne. Hank still has a narrow urethra but it's because his dick is so big. He's the biggest on the block. Dale, Nancy, and Redcorn are in an open relationship and have threesomes often.So Joseph has two dads and a mom. No real changes for Boomhauer. Bill is still more or less Bill, but he gets to have more sex and is overall less lonely since he's still in a relationship with either Rev. Stroop or Kahn's mom. Whichever you prefer. The block (read as the main adults) sometimes have key parties and orgies from time to time, and in spite of not liking each other that much Hank and Peggy are usually paired up with Minh and Kahn. This is mostly because Hank and Kahn usually gets into competition with one another over who can satisfy their wives most often( the real winners are Peggy and Mihn).
Outfits and more later maybe.
I guess I should also post my stuff here as well. It's mostly just general porn, as my /aco/ works don't make much sense without the commissioner's context. But I am always looking for more opportunities to write.
http://pastebin.com/8XWQZAeH
>>650230
I know suggestions are scarce, but FUCK king of the hill. They're boring as all hell, the art style is dull, and in the end it's the simpsons with even less humor.
If someone else wants it, go nuts but I ain't doing it.
>>650852
Not really a request. Just posting/brainstorming an idea I was toying with.
If no one wants to see it I can stop.
>>650865
Oh. I mean, if your just going at it do whatever, but I ain't touching it. I'll stick with my snuff and rape porn thanks
>>636993
Don't die
>>636993
Wow I've been waiting for one of these.
Here's my list of recommended tf/tg stories
http://pastebin.com/E1hujAqL
And another list of good erotic lit stuff I found.
http://pastebin.com/WziTL6xG
At some point a half year ago or so, I threw this together and abandoned it. Now it's here just to keep the thread going. FAIR WARNING, INCREDIBLY DARK, UNFINISHED MESS, AND THE MAIN BAD GUY IS A HEATH LEDGER RIP OFF SO BAD THAT I WONT EVEN TRY TO HIDE IT.
http://pastebin.com/8fAkASS5
Oh, and a quick recommendation to any fallout fan, a deathclaw on protag story written in... admittedly second person so it's a little weird, but there is this aspect of submission and it does keep a more lighthearted tone than any other mind break story I've read without turning goddamn creepy
http://profoundtigermentality.tumblr.com/post/133988696465/deathclaw-in-the-long-grass
>>650230
Well the thread is still here so here's the slutty default outfits for Peggy and co. No one's wearing underwear and their all slightly curvier overall. Still not supermodels though.
Peggy is now wearing a light teal green, thin, lowcut tanktop that's fit snugly under the swell of her breasts, dark blue tight lowcut short shorts, and dark blue slide-on sandles since she's less self-concious. Her glasses are still the same but the lenses have a slight teal tint to them. Peggy being Peggy, does end up getting into shenanagens due her overconfidence and biting off more than she can chew, but she's more willing to ask for help and back down when she's wrong. She also trys to get Hank to do more kinky stuff to varying sucesses.
Mihn is wearing a light gold sleeveless top that stops right under her breasts and a clevage window cut in the upper center,a dark red very short miniskirt and wedge sangles with dark brown straps. Mihn is still more or less the same except she gets off on teasing nearly everyone on her block. Especialy if it gets Kahn riled up enough to fuck her silly.
>>655401
Nancy now wears a slevless pink open dress shirt that's tied in a knot places between her breasts and her belly button, dark-blue storebought daisy dukes that are a size too small and violet hig heels. Nancy is the same for better or worse, except since she's in an open relationship with Dale and Redcorn, she's less likely to lie as much I guess. Also she's less stressed out what with having Dale and Redcorn take care of her needs. She's still kind of a bitch though.(I don't like her that much)
Luanne wears a light green tubetop that's barely holding her tits in, a red pair of hand-cut daisydukes and white flipflops. Luanne is still ditzy and kind, but is smart enough to not let people take complete advantage of her. She's not married to Lucky yet, so she tends hook-up more often and she's the one getting Peggy and the neigbor women to try new things and giving them tips about stuff.
*Note I thought about them having super ridiculous BE like proportions but I realized that that's not everyone's bag.*
If I think of more I'll post it.
Greetings, to those glancing through, staying, or searching. I am a frequenter of the ever-dwindling Undertale General of /vg/, and an author of all things dark and sweet.
Recently I have been encouraged and inspired to begin a five part series, of which so far 3 chapters are completed. I hope you enjoy, and that I am permitted to stay and share the rest. If you like what you read, then you are a sick, sick person. If you don't, you should check out the rest of what is in the pastebin accounts associated with these stories. It is much... milder.
Consensual Genocide Run - (Guro, Snuff, Long, Series, Creampie, Consent)
Ch. 1: The Ruins of Toriel
-http://pastebin.com/Exdykgbj
Ch. 2: Undyne Dying
-http://pastebin.com/BvjrH2tN
Ch. 3: Snuffing Muffet
-http://pastebin.com/ExuZhe6E
Ch. 4: Alphys's Invention
-IN PROGRESS
Ch. 5: Chara, the First Loli
-COMING SOON
After a long rest, I'm back! Working on a story with Camilla. Here's what I got so far.
http://pastebin.com/iJpiapGg
Here's a few ideas:
1.) Sofia the First- Sofia and her step siblings going full Lannister. Sofia has been fucking both of her step siblings separately, with Amber she
is the assertive top and with James Sofia plays at the submissive bottom. But she really wants them both at the same time, so she tricks them into sleeping with each for blackmail material.
2.) Monster High- Most of the time Clawdeen Wolf is a lesbian, but for one week every few months she goes into heat and goes completely cock crazed. During this time she goes to the human side of town and fucks a bunch of dudes.
3.) Ever After High- Apple White wakes up in a dungeon, where she is held captive by the cruel Raven Queen. Raven at first roughly fingers Apple, noting how wet she is. then slaps her across the face with her slick hand. Then a lot of middle core BDSM happens, things like spanking, hot wax, and slightly too big dildos and strap-ons. For the ending I have two ideas, one after the climax it's revealed that the dungeon was just a story of how Apple want her and Raven's first time to be. Raven is sitting in a daze and asks if they can just cuddle and make out and see how that goes. Apple is slightly disappointed but agrees. The second is that the dungeon is a fanfic written by Duchess Swan, one hand furiously typing and the other hand equally furiously down her panties until she starts cumming and honking like a goose
4.) Storm Hawks- Master Cyclonis has captured Piper is going to break with a whole slew of crystal powered sex toys.
>>636993
Bump
>>655806
read the first one... fucked up, sociopathic, brutal, horrifying... fucking amazing. I've never read or written anything where the core engagement was snuff, more just some last minute element to throw in, but reading this it was fascinating and erotic.
http://pastebin.com/stPKYi3S
yes, this is in fact A-10 erotica.
And it includes the sentence:
>The pilot convulsed, or tried to-this was an appendage he didn’t even have. There was no human analogy for the turbine. Legs, maybe? But the A-10 had those. And why were they so sensitive?
>>636993
Bumping
requesting Quote from cave story taking advantage of curly brace's memory loss to fuck her senseless.
>>657757
god, I want to hit that last one with the force of a thousand suns. It's not just right up my alley, it is my alley, the theme I've written the most with a cartoon I actually watched at some point. problem is I remember storm hawks lore about as well as where and when I heard it the first time. Gonna have to take a few days to come up with anything,
>>665692
It'll be worth the wait.
>>636993
Bump
Here's a few I did, they're not all that good.
http://archiveofourown.org/works/3695135
http://archiveofourown.org/works/3694976
http://archiveofourown.org/works/3694940
I'm the write friend over on the fallout assaultron thread. I've made a couple of stories with the assaultron KL-E-O and the latest part involving deathclaw breeding.
Here's part 1
>>670261
Part 2
>>670264
And here's part 3. I will be making a part 4 and maybe 5 soon enough.
I would genuinely appreciate some serious writing critiques.
http://pastebin.com/u/panicattack
More lewd writing
>>670951
panicattack here, started a new fic today about a guy going to his girlfriend's house and macking on her younger sister
http://pastebin.com/F15qafwr
pls, pls tear what i have to shreds. phrasing. sentence structure. proper tense agreement. is it even interesting to read.
i gotta see what i'm doing wrong in order to improve.
>>673291
Well, shit I don't really have anything to critique it with. The only nit-picky personal taste thing I can think of is that I don't like the > event style of writing, and that doesn't even apply to this.
Mainly just here to bump
http://pastebin.com/u/Slowass-Writefag
Haven't written anything in a long while (even though I've attempted) and it feels bad man.
I'm worried that the appeal of writing has left me and I've stagnated creatively speaking. Probably doesn't help I grew up disliking reading.
>>665671
rerequest.
>>675683
thanks for the bump.
it would be awesome if some could give me an in depth analysis though, i feel like i've been flying blind.
>>673291
Read your story and I like what I read if I'm being honest. Your dialog between characters worked well, I saw very little wrong with your punctuation if any and your sense of flow worked well.
But in saying that here's what I saw that could use improvement.
>But thankfully for the younger kids on the sofa, the movie eventually did come to an end.
You could move that sentence to the end of the previous paragraph. As for the next part
>When it was over, Luan wiped a tear from her eye and exclaimed, "I had no idea you were into these kinds of movies, Bobby! I've tried showing everyone else in this house but no one seems to have a sense of humor around here."
I don't believe in having a description before someone talks, almost like it gives away what they could say. The only things I would change is the placement of the description before Luan spoke and remove the detail before it since you've already said the movie ended. So it would now become:
>"I had no idea you were into these kinds of movies, Bobby! I've tried showing everyone else in this house but no one seems to have a sense of humor around here." Luan exclaimed as she wiped a tear from her eye.
In the end your story is in fact good. To improve you just need to keep writing. And not as in, "Keep at it and you'll get better!" mentality but to continue making stuff. Doesn't matter how bad it is, you keep on writing and you'll gradually improve. Also reading others work can help tremendously.
Its like watching someone else fighting a boss: You see how they approach it and you might think 'I'd rather do that!' or 'No no no! I would have done this instead!' or 'Oooooh! I didn't even know you could do that!'
And of course have fun with the act of creating! You made something and no one can take that feeling away from you. Enjoy it my friend!
>>676152
Read a couple of your stories and I like them. If you feel like the appeal has "dulled" in a sense I suggest trying something different, not for the feel of creativity again, but the experience of trying and or doing something new, it could help you a lot.
Is there a game you've wanted to get, see if you can grab it!
Do you watch any shows? Watch only anime? Western cartoons? Live Action/movies/etc,? Try something you'd normally not try! You might be amazed at what you'd think you hate (how I felt when watching "That 70s Show").
If you can to, step outside and just relax outside (if the weather isn't to bad and there's no one around if you're not comfortable with that.). Sometimes just some fresh air can clear your head.
Has there been something in your life that's been on your mind? Not to say its the cause but it might be why you feel the way you do.
But above all else... Relax. Clear your mind, step away for a while and come back. Do a fic on something you like, or even something you hate. What got me started writing was how much I loved reading "lemon" stories of Pokemon characters and I tried it. If you like the subject, give it a go, doesn't matter if the story turns out to be a pile of corn or freshly dug up gold!
I'm just trying to give out any advice I can to help you. In the end I hope something, if anything I said helps you friend. Good luck and hope you keep writing
>>676585
actually I'm gonna jump on those nitpicks and do some meta nitpicks, because I prefer more a flow of speech, pause for action, speech as the beat changes. So it would become:
>"I had no idea you were into these kinds of movies, Bobby!" Luan exclaimed, wiping a tear from her eye. "I've tried showing everyone else in this house but no one seems to have a sense of humor around here."
The big drawback is a bit of an overuse on commas.
>>676660
Thank ya kindly, I appreciate it.
I'll see what I can do about finding new sources for inspiration and material.
>>677292
I wouldn't say that's to many commas. As long as they serve their purpose and help the story go along I think they're fine. I actually like the way you set up the sentence here!
>>677312
No problem friend.
>>677326
I'm happy to help you friend. I know very well what its like to find the motivation to write something. Just a bit of encouragement can do a lot. You can do it!
Trying a giantess thing.
Being only 2 inches tall is kind of shit when you get down to it. Sure, it has some perks, food n' shit like that costs less, a regular television is theater sized, blah blah blah. It takes forever to get anywhere, custom electronics at this size way offset other cheap stuff, and it is impossible to get someone's attention. Take right now for instance. A perfect 10/10 qt3.14 is on the same bus as me. Gorgeous red hair, body like an hourglass, and a cute voice lamenting how she's single. Perfect opportunity for any other guy, but a monumental task for me. I try the usual gentle tapping around the feet and lower leg area, but nothing. It's amazing how people don't just notice some things, though it could be worse. Snap judgements by a few people have left me underfoot more times than I can count, so I don't wait much time to get to what I call 'the climb'. A quick mental prep, a deep breath, and off I go up her leg. Seconds later and I'm up to her thigh, and a choice to make: front or back? Both come with their own risks to be sure, but the mail lady incident from last week springs to mind. I had to sign for a package, so I'm climbing up the lady to let her know I was home and could sign. I guess I was taking to long for her because by the time I was at pants level she was already headed back to her car. I was taking the back route so by the time I realized what was going on I was falling into the back of her pants. Two firm mounds meet my face and body full force as the lady gets ready for the rest of her route. Despite my constant squirming and attempts to get her attention it took her two hours to notice me, all the while I'm getting pressed and shifted from cheek to cheek, becoming more familiar with this woman's ass than she was. By the time she did notice me she was so flustered that she shoved me back into her panties until she finished her route, and she still made me wait til the next day to sign for the package.
I wrote this for the Mommy Cinematic Universe >>>/hr/2688246
prologue
>Annie Clark - Auntie Antje's friend, and guitar teacher mommy is paying to give you lessons for your growing musical skills— prefers to teach you in her studio apartment alone. She loves to teach you by being hands on and putting her hands on yours.
gentle femdom annie 1/?
>After a hard day at school, you come crawling to Annie's studio apartment for your guitar lessons. As you enter her sizable yet modest apartment and make your way to her kitchen where she's preparing a salad with her head and curly hair down facing the counter, she perks up and immediately lose her faint smile as she sees how exhausted you are.
>"Ohh, are you okay, sweety? you look absolutely spent" she cooed as she crossed the kitchen island to get to you, wiping her hands on the flare of her almost sheer summer dress. Her warm and emphatic solemn expression changing to a tender affectionate smile as she makes her way to you. "oh, come here, sweety" she says reaching out to your head bringing it gingerly to her chest hugging you close.
>With the thin silk fabric of her dress cooling your skin, she takes your head with her hands to look at you in the face. With her delicate yet somewhat calloused fingers, she brings her thumb to the ridge of your brow brushing it, finally placing both of her hands to your cheeks. With her dainty hands encapsulating your face, she looks at you in the eyes with the stark hazel of hers relinquishing their ground for her broadening pupils.
>She hugs you close to her chest again, placing her right hand in the small of your back and her other hand to the back of your head. "I've got some cookies cooling by the window waiting for you." she whispers in your ear "Everything'll be fine, hun. I'm right here with you" she takes your head back again, kissing you in the forehead this time— stroking your hair as the contact between her lips and your skin part.
>>678703
Will continue this later if people want.
>>679086
please use paragraphs
>>679093
Sorry, typed the original thing out from my phone. Whatcha think?
Just a quick bit of advice from a friend from /d/'s erotic fiction general- it's a good idea to post fics in Pastebin format. Saves posts in the long run and lets you go back to fix typos and the like that you missed the first time around.
And I speak from personal experience when I say that there's always going to be typos that slip through.
>>665715
posting it sometime tomorrow. I just need to edit, fix spelling mistakes, etc. I think it's some of my best work.
>>673291
Is this still in progress?
>>679351
yes, just posted an update yesterday. what do you think so far?
>>679536
I read the update, I like it so far but the scene with Lincoln and Lynn seems like an incongruous tangent, since that's where it ends right now.
>>679693
yeah, i talked it over with some people and i think i'll be cutting out the lynncoln interlude
it's supposed to be something light in tone and sexy to break up the super serious drama. (in a rough draft, i had lincoln make up a comic book villainess persona for lynn and she went along with it)
if there's enough interest, i could write date night from lynncoln's perspective.
>>657757
ok I did the 4th one. I think this might be some of my best work. (certainly some of my longest)
Very dark, mind break story.
http://pastebin.com/xA9Fu64Z
>>680037
OR here, a few things:
1.) Kinda nitpicky, but you missed some capitalization.
2.) I felt the tooth bit was too far.
3.) I feel that Cyclonis would be be very selfish and not share Piper.
Other then that, I loved it.
>>680191
I'll admit the teeth thing was more a reference to one of the more brutal mind break hentais I've read then a fitting element, and it's implied that she's shared around, but I probably should have went into more detail, yeah.
>>660471
>>665671
Hey anons, do you guys have any more robot/mecha stuff?
>>636993
What is your process anons
What is some good advice you could give?
>>681699
http://pastebin.com/u/panicattack
this is me, you can read my stuff and decide if i'm capable of giving good advice
1. distractions - eliminate them. when i'm writing, i don't listen to music, i don't talk to people online, i just sit down and write. occasionally when i post an update to a thread it can be tempting to hang out afterwards, but if you want to write a lot in a given day, you have to shut out distractions. that being said, if music or having shows on in the background help you get in that zone, then do that.
2. have a rough idea of where you want to end up. sometimes i start with just bare minimum plot points i'd like to get to, sometimes it's a greentext. but if you just start writing without a map, you might get lost, or lose focus and write a lot about things that don't necessarily add to the story.
3. (mostly for fapfics but this could apply to normal stories as well) this is personal taste, but i think a lot of writers can lose sight of which parts of the story should be emphasized over others. when i'm reading something to jerk off to, i like reading about the orgasm, if there is one, and find myself rereading that paragraph over and over. if the moment is just "then she came and it felt good," that doesn't really put me in that mindset. i wanna hear more about her cumming, fill in those details.
4. above all, do things other than writing. you need to experience other stuff, whether it be real life outside, movies, vidya, other fanfics or even books if you're daring. these small bits of cultural allusions or turns of phrase can help you fill in the gaps and make your story seem that much more alive
hope i helped a little
>>681718
You did anon
Thank you and good luck
PharahXMercy bondage stuff hot off the presses. Tell me what you think (besides the fact it's long as fuck): hxxp://m-didact.tumblr.com/post/146814724025/w%C3%BCstenrose-i-overwatch-pharahmercy
>>681699
k... my process is more slated in improv. So I never... stop fully while I'm writing. I'm either writing or checking over or planning out the bones but I never fully stop, until the story is finished.
I'd actually say the opposite for the music though, but that's because I'd get bored and start thinking of other things and then the whole flow would be lost.
definitley experience other things and go in with an idea of what to do, that's some of the best advice you can get.
Maybe add an act of finality after finishing, something that you can say "I've written this down and it deserves this as a reward, as a victory dance." but that's something I just stole from independance day, and used to know when to stop on the storm hawks story.
Try your damndest to not use the same word twice in a story or at the least a paragraph. thesaurus' are brilliant for that.
Try and imagine yourself, or if there's a character narrating then them, telling what you're writing to someone else, especially if it's in first person.
Sometimes you might want to get up and move to understand the characters feeling, I guess, maybe that's just me though.
if it's a fanfic, or fapfic, definitley brush up on your knowledge of the subject and maybe the fetish.
Study the way your favourite authors organize words or which ones they use (esp. erotic descriptions and metaphors)
Oh and for practice, try and come up with a story based on a single noun. Eg Stop sign. The last time I sped through a stop sign I robbed a bank. The origin of stop signs is that in africa you can't run over baboons and they all have red asses. I was driving through main when a stop sign grew arms and legs and eyes and screamed "KILL ME PLEASE! DR. KINDERSTIEN HAS GONE TOO FAR!!"
But that's just me and I've only been writing for a while.
>>682352
Where did you get your theme from, I really like the appearance. I've been trying to find one that'd be a fit for reading
>>636993
Pastebin http://pastebin.com/u/bobsled_hostage
And Ao3 with better formatting http://archiveofourown.org/users/Bobsled_Hostage
>>682888
It's called Blocked Out - one of the free Tumblr themes. I'm still not entirely sold on it, but it works for what I need right now. What did you think of the story?
>>682942
The story is simply stunning. I'm not a fan of f/f but you've actually made it erotic in my eyes. Your attention to detail is amazing and you set the mood between them very well. I've read the whole thing and you did a great job.
The only complaint I have is when you have Angela fingering Fareeha. You said she used her pointer and ring finger, and I'm not sure if this is a place to place thing or if you meant the pointer/index finger and middle finger. Other than that little detail I loved everything about it.
>>681072
Yeah m8, I read them and they are nice and all but do you have anything else mecha/robot?
>>680885
oh boy do i have a treat for you...
http://www.titanatelier.com/
Would it be gauche to advertise for commission work here? I ask because there's also a commission thread up but I think it's exclusively for art.
>>684392
Yeah that stuff is a bit too unhuman for me. I kinda like to keep it to 4 limbs max/min, and human like body proportions.
Pic related it kinda my limits
But thanks for the link anyways.
>>684818
I don't see why not.
How /D/ is acceptable here?
Just tried my hand at writing lewd shit.
Gnoll futa + elf girl.
Sorry if this is a shitty request.
I'd like to request a Futurama story with Fry lovingly fucking Amy and Leela senseless. The basic premise is all three of them are essentially married to each other because it's the future so it's not a big deal. The three of them are taking a long weekend to celebrate an anniversary or something. So what better way to celebrate than to stay in their apartment and fuck on and off for three days straight. They take breaks in between of course. I'd like for Leela to be curvy, busty, and maybe kinda hairy and for Amy to be more petite, not as busty as Leela, and little to no body hair. Also because of all the crap that happened to Fry, he's got a bigger dick and a lot of stamina because I can't think of a better reason. Maybe there's some squirting.
I'd also like to see non-traditional things like maybe Amy has puffy nipples or Leela has inverted or kinda long nipples or a big clit or something. If you don't want to do that you don't have to. So long as Leela and Amy get fucked silly for a while I'll satisfied.
Bonus points for Fry fucking the scrunchy out of Leela's hair.
If you need more info/a better prompt let me know.
>>688010
Sure, please post. Any other tags on the content besides the nature of the characters?
>>684818
>>686181
Ah. Well then.
I'm the guy behind the Gav the Ogryn stories over on /tg/ (Link: https://1d4chan.org/wiki/Gav_and_Bob) and I find myself in need of some extra cash.
So if there's any story/scene you want to see realized and you don't mind paying for it, reply to this post with your idea.
>>688422
Prices and off limits kinks?
>>688221
>I'll be satisfied.
>>682905
Just added a third chapter to one of my non lewd stories
http://archiveofourown.org/works/6867895/chapters/15672340
>it's a 'Vriska 8eats her moirail' episode
>>688665
I haven't worked out a pricing plan yet; I'm torn between per-word pricing and a flat fee.
Off-limit kinks? Well, I'm not too keen on writing about underage characters for legal reasons, and scat and hard gore are kinda iffy. Anything else is a case-by-case basis (since there are so many damn fetishes that I can't keep track of all of them. :V )
>>688367
Here you go:
http://pastebin.com/ZwjUs2La
So I suppose tags are:
Furry, teen/young (though not explicitly mentioned), lesbian, futa, jizzing everywhere, lady jizz, elf (can't recall if that's mentioned either.)
It's consensual.
Also just wrote it for a laugh at the suggestion of a colleague who read the first half of my novel and thought it had lesbian overtones.
Then there was a discussion about hyena peen.
Then that my novel has no naughty language.
So I was challenged to write a lewd scene with no naughty words.
Anyway. That's that.
>>680885
http://pastebin.com/4Z2S2rqa
Anyone else here interested in interactive fiction? I find being able to bounce ideas off other people to be a great motivator for writing.
I mostly post on the BEA, but occasionally I drudge through writing.com.
>>688221
Seconding.
>>690284
yeah, I'm interested
>>690130
HOLY FUCK ANON. THANK YOU.
Amazing, I fucking loved it. It has been too long since I had a good fap. If you got any more please feel free to post it.
Btw, is this an OC by you?
>>690130
Oops, there goes my dick
>>678703
Continue yes please
I dunno if they're popular enough for anybody to even have any requests, but I'll take any weight gain or pregnancy requests anybody has.
>>692888
Will you do xeno preggo? Because I want a threeway between Ben, Looma, and Attea while they're carrying his kid.
>>692888
A few questions.
Do you care if it's just mild weight gain and not full on SSBBW stuff? What are your thoughts on lactation and orgies? Would you care if it was an effort post with pics and the like?
>>693185
Light weight gain is fine with me. Go ahead with the orgies, but I'll warn you in advance I'm not terribly confident in the quality of my sex scenes.
Go ahead and effortpost. I can't guarantee it'll be done though, but if I think I can do a good job I'll give it a shot. Just don't want to shit out something terrible for the sake of getting it out.
>>692888
Arkhamverse Harley Quinn falls into a downward spiral and drowns her grief in food after the end of Arkham Knight, now that all trace of Joker is gone. Even Batman has vanished so she doesn't even have anyone to take vengeance on.
>>693283
Sorry for the wait. Some stuff came up so it might not be as good as I want it. If you have questions or need a better explanation let me know.
Ok. This is a Totally Spies prompt where Alex,Clover,and Sam end up becoming chubby lactating sex goddesses. The idea is that the ladies crash-land on some potentially magic uncharted island and the natives recognize and worship them as goddesses. That means food, wine, jewelry, body-paint, massages, general pampering and sex. The ladies still try to contact the outside world and end up teaching them things that improve their lives, but as time goes on, they become more and more content until they're pudgy, lactating, blissed out, oversexed queens.
Basically I'm asking for a summary of how they got to that point. I would like it to be as consensual as possible, because this does sound a bit mind control-ly.But I guess that can be because of the nature of the island. Again they're not really fat, but pudgy, with most of the weight going to their tits,asses,and thighs. Maybe they get puffy nipples because of the lactation. Also maybe they're a little hairy because they're away from modern conveniences. If you don't want to write sex you can just focus on the pampering stuff like bathing, applying the paint, massages and the like and how they're practically cumming from that.
Sorry if this was shit.
>>694515
>I would like it to be as consensual as possible, because this does sound a bit mind control-ly.
damnit.
can someone take a crack at writing something with vivian? maybe her rubbing one while bordely browsing /aco, maybe calling up a male escort, maybe something fucked up, I don't care.
>>694792
If that's a deal-breaker then sorry.
If anybody would like to, I request a fic involving MLaaTR background character Jeremy (the one with the spiky hair) having rough sex with Jenny
working on a fic where a boy and his sister jerk each other off
where's my newberry award
http://pastebin.com/YW65MMsp
>>695833
i'm joking, by the way! my writing is pretty terrible
I don't know if this is the right place to ask, but I've been searching for a fic for a while. It was on HF but I guess the guy took it down or something? It was about Wednesday Adams and I think it was called Everyday is Wednesday.
>>688221
No one like Futurama?
this is as good a place as any I suppose.
http://pastebin.com/E6u076QD
story about a guy getting stalked and eventually molested by an invisible girl. No proper lewds yet. Ongoing, as in I'm sitting down to update it right now.
http://pastebin.com/Xh769MLp
short about a guy getting molested by giant alien slugs
http://pastebin.com/a88zqWpj
story about a guy getting captured and molested by cervine aliens.
>>695356
nah, I'm the guy who wrote the storm hawks metal gear and... uh teacher crossover I geuss.
>>696654
I would but I'm in kind of a non-con mood. plus leela's character seems too jealous and protective to be into it.
>>696887
I figured Amy and Leela were good enough friends and in this AU they're more chill.
So is this thread done?
>>690130
Damn, I nutted.
Androids are a high tier fetish of mine.
>>700030
It's your lucky day anon, I like that idea and I'll take a shot at it.
>>700114
Oh goody. Off at /efg/ an anon wrote a bit for it but abandoned the story.
I recall they took some differences in premise, by making it a worker hospitalized in an accident on day one, with his consciousness transferred to an android so he could still do work.
Gave me other ideas of where it could lead, with it being revealed once the body heals that the brain mapping works like in the game SOMA where it's a copying rather than a movement of consciousness, meaning the protagonist android is actually a AI construct based on the original that then has memories implanted back into the original. Image stuck in my mind is the android protagonist having a breakdown when he/she/it is confronted with the fact that they aren't the original, and trying to strangle the original, and finding they can't will themself to harm anyone as it violates Asimov's rules on robotics, coming to the realization they are an android, just before being shut down ending a chapter.
There's a lot of freedom to go in directions with the premise, whether folks know about the protagonist's condition or not, and whether they have volition or not.
I'll try to find the pastebin of it on /efg/ if you care. I generate a lot of ideas there.
Posting old story ideas/outline for Big Hero Six
>>700140
>>700142
>>700030
>>700139
Random question, how robotic do you want the android to be? Completely human-looking, semi-human?
Also, do you want the android to be completely androgynous and gender neutral to start with and then feminised, or start androgynous but slanted towards female? I had an idea involving the vicitm being assigned with a female name and pronouns and being unable to refer to themselves as a "he" from the beginning.
>>700436
Your idea works fine. I like the idea of starting less humanoid and becoming more gynoid with additional mods and part replacing. I've always enjoyed the notion of a stylized screen face, but that's mostly to avoid a chance of getting a creepy uncanny valley mannequin face. If anything, cuteness/friendliness fits the function
http://pastebin.com/u/Vaiire
I could use some criticism, actually. Suffice to say I'm pretty slow with my updates due to IRL shit, but this pastebin is strictly Souls stuff as I parade around the Souls thread here on /aco/. I've done lewds for other threads, but I lost those pastebin links a long time ago.
Be frank with me, /aco/, is it shit?
>>700539
I read through Maiden in Black, and although I have only a shallow understanding of DeS, I still found it hot and really well written.
One thing that came to mind, though, was occasional inconsistencies in tone. You did a great job capturing the dark gothic tone of the games in the dialog and a lot of the descriptions, but then very rarely a word would sneak in that undermined it just a bit.
13. I don't really agree with the word "discrepancies" to describe the texture of someone's skin. I would only see people use it for two people arguing.
17. The use of "pre-cum" doesn't feel right in the context of a woman's excitement. Wetness, lust, etc would feel a little better imo.
21. The big one, I really really was taken out of the experience when I read the word "splooge". It just feels so ill fitting to the world you've been writing about, there's a better word out there.
25. Butt-cheeks.
Despite all that, I think you write exceptionally well. In terms of the bare minimum, you're solid. No spelling errors or grammar mistakes, punctuation is fine, and tense is maintained. The visuals and dialog are excellent, and I found it to be really exciting despite knowing nothing about these characters. Keep writing man, you got a knack for it.
>>700569
Thank you, I appreciate that. I'll buckle down on my proof-reading from now on to make sure I iron out those inconsistencies. If you notice anything else, please let me know.
>>700590
not a problem. i'll look through your other fics when i can and respond in the thread. if possible, would you be interested in doing the same for my fics?
pastebin.com/u/panicattack
>>700596
I've got your pastebin bookmarked, but it's pretty late right now so I'll have to get back to you this time tomorrow.
>>700608
sure thing, no rush on that
So I wrote a ~25000 word multi-chaptered harem pokemon fapfic, got it to 250 follows on FFN, and then deleted every trace of it from the internet because of an attack of sudden paranoia. Now I'm too embarrassed to write and the prospect of having to start all over from 0 readerbase is putting me off even more. Kill me.
>>700657
this may come off as cynical, but maybe it's best if you left it. who's the say you won't suffer another panic attack down the line and delete it all again?
post on anonymous here if you really feel the itch
>>700652
OR, and this is incredibly up my alley.
These are the stuff in the original abandoned story, if interested. But I'm incredibly happy with what you have thus far, and glad you did what I'm unable to do and just push yourself to write regardless of quality/not second guessing yourself.
http://pastebin.com/G25i9RZC
http://pastebin.com/V3HU0caf
http://pastebin.com/hQapyf7g
got a crapload of wrestling, catfight, and other fighting stories on various forums and collected on a blog. mostly commission work, but just finished a 50+ sexy kung fu western epic over the last few years that someone hired me for that I'm pretty proud of
also got a Betty vs Veronica and a Scully vs Lois Lane in there
googling Excitin Fightin should pull it up easy enough
>>701013
where do you commission your work? i was all set to commission until i realized paypal reveals your real name to the commissioner and i cant have that associated with my smut since i plan to write professionally
>>694515
Are those other ladies the spies moms in that bottom pic?
>>701637
Yes
>>701664
Is it too late to add them to the prompt or would that be too much.
>>701032
paypal's my usual way, [email protected]
I've taken checks before, just charged a bit more for the time and all. but open to other means if I have to
don't needs names, so could be a spare email/paypal account for all I care
>>701691
It's probably easier to write for three characters than six.
>>700609
Alright, so I gave your material a read and I definitely like what I see. You're consistent, and you do a good job of expressing the Loud House characters in a believable way. Grammar, spelling, punctuation and pacing are all top-notch. Granted, there were those underdeveloped fics that I'm sure you just copied and pasted from various /co/ or /trash/ threads to keep a record of, so I'll avoid judging those ones. Overall, you have a bit more freedom compared to my Souls work. You're allowed to go out of your way to provide thoughts and motives for the characters, and like I said: you do a damn good job at making it believable.
However, one thing that did bother me was excessive swearing. It's not a huge issue, it's just my personal preference. Fucks and shits have their place and can make good punctuation, but I often find there are better words to pick (dialogue excluded, of course), since just throwing around curse words can come across as a little jarring. Especially from Lincoln. I'd appreciate it if you take my advice with a grain of salt, since it's such a minor grievance
>>702634
Thank you so much for the critique, I appreciate that you were able to look through my work and view it with a critical eye. I totally understand where you're coming from with my use of profanity, and it's something I'll have to be more disciplined about in the future. I'm gonna go back and make sure that they aren't used flippantly, but at the same time, I feel like it's thematically consistent with the explicit nature of the fic.
I just read through Rosabeth and Worshipper and I loved both of them. Your writing is exceptional in both structure and intent and I found that they were both incredibly effective as smut. I spotted one small typo in Rosabeth. In paragraph 7, the second to last sentence says "each teasing like" when I believe it should say "each teasing lick"
In Worshipper, this sort of refers to my previous post, but your use of the word blowjob in paragraph 13 feels slightly out of place. I know that it's accurate and the easiest way to describe it, but there might be a better way. You used excellent similes for religious prayer in the same fic, perhaps another one would work well. Also, the part where the Worshipper "whispered: "that is..." I feel could be formatted as "whispered, "That is..." Paragraph 14 has an extra period in the first sentence. I would also say "her face slump" instead of "her face slumped" to match tense with "she felt her arms buckle"
Please let me know if I'm missing the forest for the trees with my comments. The takeaway should be that I thoroughly enjoy your work and I look forward to whatever you happen to write, even if I don't know the lore.
>>636993
Here's a prompt that'll entice some writers!
Azula from A:TLA being blindfolded, bound, gagged, and gangbred (i.e gangbanged with the express and explicit intention of knocking up the girl, usually with her permission) by a bunch of Water Tribesmen (around 10 - 15).
And she's loving every goddamn minute of it, from the first second to the last.
>>703049
In my defence, those were rushed. Simple requests from the folks over in the Souls general on /aco/. I find that doing those types of small requests prevent stagnation to help me with the larger works I need to do. Your comments are appreciated as it's just further evidence I need to buckle down on my proof-reading, so thank you.
I'm also rather curious if you have anything else for me to read? Even if it's non-lewd.
>>703876
Not a problem. Sometimes there are mistakes in our writing that we miss and it helps to have someone else look through them.
Speaking of which, did you really go through my entire pastebin? That's flattering, I don't think I'd even read all my stuff again given the chance. Unfortunately, those fics reflect the entirety of my writing. I got into it because of Loud House and never put forth a serious effort before that.
>>704121
I've always believed in having a fresh pair of eyes. What I think I type and what I actually type can sometimes be two completely different things; those examples you made are proof of that. And yeah, I went through your whole pastebin; however, I will admit to speed-reading through the non-standard/green-texted fics. You have talent, and it showed in your Adult Swim piece. I reckon you should focus on what made that one stand out so much and try to replicate it.
>>704269
Thank you, I appreciate the advice and the kind words.
>>703181
I might actually take that. like I haven't gotten that far into avatar, and I haven't done that much full consensual but I feel like that is something I could do anyway.
Actually can you recommend me some episodes that showcase azula's personality and history? Could help a lot.
>>704489
not that guy but her mother hated her, maybe due to spotting her sociopathic tendencies fairly early on. Her father played her against her brother and reinforced her sociopathic tendencies. She believes in the whole 'nobles are just better' thing to a crippling degree because she has to. Otherwise she's what her mother says she is; an emotionally stunted monster with little to no empathy.
Funnily enough while she's excellent at at intrigue and war the things that make her good at cut throat manuvering make her incredibly awkward in normal socialization.
My advice is just to find an ATLA episode guide, dig up the beach episode, watch the one where she brings in a giant drill to siege that one earth kingdom city, that one where she zaps Aang in the back and cuts off his avatar state, and uh...fuck it's been awhile. That one where she manipulates Mai and Tai Lee into being her back up crew?
TL;DR
Sociopathic bitch who is great at manipulating, bullying, and controlling people but horrible at normal social interaction.
>>704572
lovely, actually it's good that you gave me that description to start with, I was thinking of starting with something that would've gone completely against her personality. A 'I've done horrible things and for my sins I repent' or some shit. I'll probly have it done in a few days, 10 at most.
>>704572
That's episodes "The Beach" "The Drill" "The Crossroads of Destiny"
>>704609
glad I could help, happy writing anon!
>>704334
It's all good, man. If we're anything alike, then you know it's rare to find anyone willing to critique your work with any real acumen. So whenever you have the time, please let me know what you think of the other works on my pastebin.
>>704489
Like other have mentioned, Azula comes across as a rather meticulous individual, but deep-down, past all the emotional layers lies a very psychotic girl. Her psychosis stems from the lack of a mother-daughter relationship, which was instead replaced by constant, almost militaristic, ideologies. She strives for perfection and genuinely believes she's better than everyone else around her, including her friends. So while she bares the image of a noble, her inner-most thoughts are of an emotionally vulnerable, rather fragile little girl. So you could probably write in a decent mind-break there if you were so willing.
>>703181
I know what you are doing knowing damn well I would see that, I hope you burn in hell for even entertaining that idea.
>>704489
>>704609
Don't you fucking dare. I will slice your throat wide open.
>>704572
>>704681
You motherfuckers got the character all wrong. She is poor lost soul who never received love from anyone and you want to taint her purity? I ought to bitch slap every single one of you for trying to defile the great Azula.
>>704681
much that I'd like to, it is my biggest fetish, the OR was for loving it the whole way, which is a challenge that I'm looking forward to. I have a few ideas on what to do, where to go, and the emotions that would prompt it. If it all goes to shit, though, I'll just do a standard mind break.
>>704733
Put a fucking bag over your head, tie it around your neck, and start breathing deeply. This type of porn is not welcome here.
>>704732
your tears are delicious.
>>704743
>>704744
>>704746
I'm not Scrapper, but I think this type of horseshit is not funny. Azula deserves better than this goddamn it. I don't know what it's going to take for you idiots to back the fuck off my daughterfu and stop using her as whacking material for your sick stupid fetishes. i mean I enjoy porn as much as the other guy but goddamn do we really have to sink so low? I mean give me a fucking break.
>>704739
>>704732
well geez someone's threatening my life again better act like I give a shit.
I'd ask you to take the character less seriously if you're on a board where she's passed around like a prison bitch but lets be honest, mommy and daddy are probably fighting in the other room and you need something to distract yourself. I'd ask you to ride the nearest cylindrical object you've affectionately named azula but I'm sure daddy took it when he caught you screaming her name. so here, take this and wank yourself raw while the adults start writing.
>>704747
What would you prefer? I could deliver something like sex in the missionary position with the one she loves for the sole purpose of pro-creation while consummating her marriage. I could include things such as hand-holding, eye-contact and maybe even some kissing.
>>704750
Hey dipshit, I write too and even I don't touch Azula because I'm not a fucking despicable piece of shit of a human being like yourself. Th people who fap to her have no clue who she is a person. I hope you get cancer for trying to ruin the character you never even cared for. Hell you probably just like her desi
>>704747
nothing is sacred
everything is permitted
at this point I'm motivated to make Azuila fics where she's sexually abused to piss off people like you.
never let them see you sweat sweetheart.
>>704758
At least I can look myself in the mirror and call myself a human being being. You are nothing more than an attention whore making shitty fanfics for no profit. I would pity you but you know better and yet you will continue being part of the scum of the Earth for whatever reason. Just end your life because this is pathetic.
>>704767
(You)
>>704767
I will never cease to be amazed at how angry azulafags get when you challenge their perception of a psycholoically broken sociopath who hates herself so much she wanders off into a spirit forest for like, 7 years so she can trade her face away to become someone else.
Or did that get retconned? I recall her hanging out with the Gaang after awhile. Anyways she's an abusive sadistic bitch who has nothing in her life but hurting, manipulating, and destroying. She really is an ugly human being and there's nothing quite so pathetic as watching waifu fags completely spin a character for their wiafu out of whole cloth because the actual character is so awful.
This thread is kind of a shitshow isn't it.
>>704821
well how else do you keep a thread from dieing?
kinda vague request but
i would absolutely love if someone took this and wrote it into a rape scene.
>>704829
Probably better just restart the thread another day. Hope for better luck next time.
Who knows. Maybe it can be salvaged.
>>704831
well before anyone takes that we'll need the comic no at least or title or something.
>>704838
I'll drop the end result here so mr shouty can piss and moan where no one will care and then if need be we'll start a new thread.
>>704850
I'm no comic buff, but I reckon that anon is looking for a fapfic where Scarecrow utilizes his fear toxin to rape someone.
>>704821
The main problem is that there aren't a lot of writefags in this thread and the ones who are here kinda have tunnel vision for certain fetishes.
>>704866
Also too few requests.
>>704732
>>704747
>>704756
>>704767
This is obvious bait.
>>704758
>straightjacket conveys bondage theme
>legs not restrained
Why would they stop halfway..?
>>704866
Honestly, I think that's how one gets into writefaggotry, you have a specific fetish that you can't find porn for or visual porn can't convey it too well, and you have to create your own. Either that or people with very active imaginations are prone to fetishization.
>>704831
I find Spiderman absolutely unsexy as fuck, but might be willing to do something else with J Crane.
I had a fantasy a few years ago based on the newer Batman movie series where Scarecrow gets his own fear toxin shoved in his face and is then raped. Except he's both terrified, getting off on it, and analytically studying his reactions while it happens.
>>704681
hey man, i completely get where you're coming from. are you on discord? you should add me panicattack #1811
anyone that's reading this is free to send a request. it'd be nice to have some writer friends to share ideas with.
i read through adella/arianna, chloanne, dancer, and artorias today. my favorite of them is artorias, just because of how much more substantial it was. i liked all of them but wanted more! i know how much effort it takes to tease out a moment to its full potential, but the benefits are huge for the reader. nobody ever complained about having too much cake.
to comment quickly on what i read, i'm not a fan of unbirth, but you wrote about it in an interesting way, i have to ask. does vordt literally shrink inside the dancer? what's happening there? i like the idea of chloanne being a mindbroken cock slave, but we didn't see much, and adella/arianna even less so.
i skimmed through the fool's idol and liked the usage of tiny imp things as additional participants, but the imagery of the idol itself was a little hard to grasp.
i am wondering if anybody would do a Caption for this pic?
something involving Pregnancy, Incest, MILF, and Brainwashing.
>>705491
I'd advise story based on this greentext
>>704866
Yea I'll admit to being part of that problem.
>>705159
The thing is about those requests is that when I put it out there, I said anything goes. Literally the first request was an unbirthing, and I like to be a man of my word. It's not a fetish was exactly familiar with but I have no standards so I just kind of got my references and went to it. I also found it to be lack-lustre, and suffice to say my readership did too. To answer your question, Vordt is... de-aging, and in a sense "shrinking", but I didn't exactly convey that in a good manner.
Adella/Arianna didn't get much because I'm saving that idea for a much larger product, so it was only supposed to be a tease. Same as Chloanne. The Demon's Holes project will eventually see me getting through DaS1, DaS2 and Bloodborne, so I didn't want to blow my load early, y'know?
What did you find hard to grasp about Fool's Idol? Was I just not clear enough?
>>704775
How dare you. Honestly where do you come off of saying that kind of shit? Azula had a shitty life where she had 0 chance of being the good guy Aang was/is because she had an abusive father and a neglectful mother and you are going to put that on her? You got it wrong, it's because she is a little rough around the edges which makes her attractive. She needs to be protected because she already went through hell. She doesn't need anyone piling more on her woes.
>>705911
I think it was just my state of mind when I was reading it, but I was confused about her anatomy. You mentioned she had four arms, I filled in the gap that she might have multiple heads as well? Now that I look at her design and see she's a pretty standard humanoid female with four arms, things are a lot more clear.
It's just an instance of me not playing the games, I guess.
This thread is gold. Will this be a frequent thing? Cause if so I'll probably be taking requests in the next one.
>>706527
long as people keep making it anons will keep requesting things. One thing to keep in mind is if you don't see it in the catalog then you need to dig up the OP post from the archive and copy/paste it if you make a new thread.
>>706499
your waifu is a a sadistic monster who lives to aggrandize herself through the suffering of others.
Also she isn't real.
>>706539
Got it. Thanks for the tip.
Do any of the writers here specialize in things? Like specific genres they prefer?
>>704992
that's kind of the opposite what i'm looking for here
switch the roles and make scarecrow the rapist and you're gold
>>706542
Monsters don't cry like she did or reflect on their actions like Azula does.
>>706555
serial murderers are known to feel remorse and to self reflect on their actions.
But they're monstrous assholes who keep murdering and raping because they enjoy it too much to stop.
your waifu is a monsterous blot of ink.
>>706562
She doesn't enjoy it though. See her breakdown and the beach episode.
>>706574
doesn't matter whether or not she enjoys it she keeps doing it. We lock psychopaths up for a reason.
>>706577
She is just a kid, she can still change.
>>706508
Oh, I see. Yeah, it's just a matter of knowing the source material. I deliver directly to the Souls threads here, so having to describe appearances didn't cross my mind. Thanks for the feedback, regardless.
>>706548
I specialise in mind break, rape, general humiliation, bdsm, that sort of thing. If a nation would do it to a war criminal pre-UN I'll try it.
Hello, fellow writefags! I come from the magical land of futas and dragon dildos! I'm here to posit a question to all of you, if you'll let me.
Over on /d/, the /efg/ thread to be more specific, I've set up a request archive where people (supposedly) go and post their unfilled requests after they post them in the thread. I'm considering making on for this thread so that the writefags here have something to work on in the downtime between threads.
Is this a good idea or no?
>>706865
I support it.
I post lewd ideas there constantly.
>>706865
Fuck it, here it is!
Your unfilled request archive is: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1PH-f4Q0yeuTYrQHnGQewkKzM_9bircXxhfnIKe-Vk5s/edit?usp=sharing
I'mma try to get started on that story archive sometime tomorrow, if not Thursday. Once that's set up, I'll post a link to it so people can add their stories to it and not have to worry about me checking my email.
>>706928
Good to know.
>>692888
So was this bait or what?
>>706583
Your sadistic waifu isn't real and can't change
>>707262
>sadistic waifu
>wanting them to change
doing it wrong
>>707166
I was busier than expected initially and then I ended up working on the android story, so sorry.
For shits and giggles, here's a link to the Fallout story I have been working on for a little while now. This is just what I have written so far and I will be continuing as I have time to write.
http://pastebin.com/RAesBVAi
Current tags are... Fallout, M/f, virgin, Rape, painal, creampie, teasing, torment, whipping, spanking, bondage.
Any serious critique is welcome. (this is the first I have written in about four years)
I have a pretty good idea for a story and i tought about making it into a comic. But i just realized i cant draw for shit. So im gonna write it down instead. My idea is basically this: Sam ia a very protected, short and skinny little girl who just moved out to a little town in the country side. The first day in her new high school doesnt go as planned. When she gets there she notices something. Apparently this is a nudist high school, and everyone is expected to wear nothing as a school uniform. Sam, whos always been a proper little girl, came to school wearing her usual jeans and tshirt with long sleeves. When she refuses to strip infront of the whole school, she is brought to the principals office for some good spanking. The story basically goes on by telling how the principal and the sexual environment forces Sam to become a complete degenerate slut. Her mom doesnt know, of course. What do you think? Original or has it been done a lot before?
>>707169
Yes, so that we don't clutter up the thread with re-requests every time this thread gets posted.
>>707262
She can and is.
>>708019
works well enough. I don't think it goes here, since it's not a uh... A western cartoon but it sounds like a nice corruption story and I don't know where it's supposed to go.
>>708501
Fair enough. Wish we could do something with pics though.
>>709051
... captions? could make captions of shit? people put in requests... with images, and we do that.
>>704992
>Honestly, I think that's how one gets into writefaggotry, you have a specific fetish that you can't find porn for or visual porn can't convey it too well, and you have to create your own. Either that or people with very active imaginations are prone to fetishization.
I find it to be a mix of both. I still remember how I started out of simple impatience with a prompt I had going unfilled, then realizing after the fact that it wasn't as hard as I feared it would be. I suggest anyone else here who's in a similar spot take the plunge as well, if only as an experiment. What do you have to lose?
>>709351
I mean people who post pics with their requests.
>>709454
Ah, well can we do that anyway? I just wrote something based on this and it's pretty good, I think.
>>709485
I'm asking if someone were to post their request is there a way for them to see the pics that go with them.
>>709569
And I've completely misinterpreted it and now made a caption for it. it's also the first time I've written a romance.
>>709594
It's pretty good.
>>709620
thanks. Maybe I should do romance again sometime. Or captions for that matter.
